over the past 10 years ive tried coming back to the truth only to find myself back in the world doing silly things again and again. I am onnce again determined to come back to the truth but feel that i am beyond redemption. I feel ashamed going to talk to the elders cause they have dealt with me on two other occasions once being disfellowshipped 10 years ago and reproved two years ago. I know I want to come back but am not certain that i wont stuff up again.
anyone else feel inadequate
98%(give or take a few) of the people who post here have a dim view towards the organization so
it is highly unlikely you will find the encouragement you are looking for.
If your heart is set to go back then this is not the place for you.
Best wishes in your quest for inner peace & truth.
Remember this whether you go back or not.
Your approval comes from God alone - not from men, not even from men who claim to act on God's behalf - like you, they are only men and as such they're imperfect.
Keep your eyes and heart fixed on God alone no matter how bad those elders try to make you feel (if you go back) - you serve Him
PS - DO NOT tell them you've visited this site or you might be in trouble for that too!!!
I do hope you stick around to research though - ignore the fluffy threads and go for the Bible study ones. Don't be afraid to ask questions - no judgement here!
And dont be afraid to consider the idea that even the Bible may not be everything you thought it was. Consider the billions of people who believe in the Qu'ran and the Gita's and ask if you can truly limit yourself to just one supposedly divinely inspired book. And if you're feeling steely, read something of Richard Dawkins. Then make up your mind.
I used to feel inadequate all the time but feel a lot better now
this board has helped me a lot.
I'm just guessin', but I would say EVERY JW feels inadequate. That's how you're supposed to feel, isn't it. They constantly, week after week, year after year, remind you of how much more you should/could be doing, they constantly force feed guilt on you. You'll NEVER graduate from the Theocratic Minstry School, ...................You could try staying heavily medicated, that helps....for awhile.
But...I'd suggest moving on with you life and accepting that being a JW doesn't work for you.
Welcome to the board, hope you find what you're looking for.
I agree with hope4others. The great majority of the people that post on this website do not favor the jehovahs witness organization. As a suggestion, ask yourself if what you have done to "sin" are really sins or just the jehovahs witness guilt trip indoctrination.
Welcome to the board.
I began to investigate my faith carefully in 2003, trying to determine 'the truth about the Truth'. When I did - I left that religion. I hope you do the same - Investigate your faith. Jehovah's Witnesses tell everyone to do that - but they rarely do it themselves. When they do - they often find out things they never knew.
You owe it to yourself. This site might help. Stick around.
constantly, week after week, year after year, remind you of how much more you should/could be doing, they constantly force feed guilt on you.
For the longest time, I thought the problem was with me. I guess that's the point of it all, isn't it? You're not doing enough and (unspoken) you therefore are never deserving of Jehovah's unconditional love. And if you're not spending every waking moment talking, thinking, and doing theocratic things, you'll be destroyed at Armageddon.
What a way to live.
Your whole soul is bound bt JW talk!
So you choose to be!
And we all know the JW circles within spirals of lifestyle expectation are unachievable and relentlessly depleting of inner energies. At least that is my total experience of their ethos. It is also an ethos you will find elsewhere and building your own holistic optimism with nature and life and whatever you can tune into is not easy, especially without support from others! So relying on a ready made system to do so for you will have conflicts as well as support mechanisms. It is unavoidable! It is a system of 'arms length' support for large groups who must adhere to its infrastructure to maintain that tenuous support! Otherwise it would be unsustainable in its current form!
Personally I seek soul bonds but will not succumb to weaker support networks to pacify my personal weaknesses because ultimately it further weakens and removes me from who I am as an individual to an extent that I do not know anything about anything without referencing myself to a group that makes me feel that way anyhow! I become reliant upon that which takes away my personal essence and am then at the mercy of confusion and depression and desparation and despair!
I do not wish to go back!
Sorry if that is not what you wanted to hear but it is what I feel!