First time JWs have been at my door--post exit...

by Confession 18 Replies latest jw experiences

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    Nice work.

    Maybe ya' shoulda invited them in - had a quick study and asked them 'Is there anything preventing me from getting baptised' as the ethiopian asked. Then took them out to the pool and made them climb in a baptise you.

    Well - just for fun.

    Jeff

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    I think the first time the witlesses drop by and get in will be their last. Even if they are successful in getting in, they will not have time to censor the rap music I have before I pull out my Ouija board and pray to Satan to hamper their work and stumble every single one of their studies, or my Crisis of Conscience book and start a study from that. Also, they will not have time to find the porn I put in my computer before I pull out an apostate web site and start teaching off that.

  • lovelylil
    lovelylil

    I think you handled that very well. It will give them "food for thought". Lilly

  • myelaine
    myelaine

    I was visited the other day with an invite to the memorial. I said that I wasn't interested in going because I think all the sheep should take the emblems. He said that only the anointed are to take them because only the anointed were present with Jesus.

    I said, I thought if Jesus came in invisibly in 1914 that you wouldn't need to continue doing this in rememberance of Him? he said, well I wasn't around in 1914...and neither were you...

    while I was wondering how this had anything to do with anything...he said have a nice day and left.

    In retrospect I'm thinking neither of us were very good witnesses that time.

    love michelle

  • DoomVoyager
    DoomVoyager

    He said that only the anointed are to take them because only the anointed were present with Jesus.

    Ask them to show you where in the bible it says that Judas left before the apostles partook of the emblems. Hint: it actually says just the opposite.

  • sacolton
    sacolton

    Just look at them surprised and say with a smile ...

    "Oooooh! You're not a Christian group ... you're a CULT!" (laugh) (close door)

  • myelaine
    myelaine

    thanks Doom...

    I knew that, I also could have mentioned that none of the anointed partaking today were with Jesus...or what about Paul, he wasn't there either!

    I'm sorry...I choked

    p.s. on a happier note...I've seen a handful of suits checking out the web address (freeminds) plastered on the back of my car!

  • Confession
    Confession

    I'm imagining the conversation that might have been had they tried to talk to me...

    ELDER 1: Cult? Why do you say that?

    ME: I call it a cult, for lack of a better term, primarily because they apply "high pressure" to manipulate those among them to accept their authority and perspectives, and to do as they say.

    ELDER 1: We're not under any pressure.

    ME: Oh no?

    TOGETHER: Not at all.

    ME: So do you think it's important to get ALL the information on a particular subject before making up your mind about something?

    ELDER 1: Of course.

    ME: Great, because I have a little brochure here about why Jehovah's Witnesses are a cult.

    ELDER 2: We don't need to see your brochure.

    ME: Don't "need" to see it? Or you're "pressured" not to look at it? Hmmm, sounds like a cult to me.

    ELDER 1: Look, we are NOT a cult!

    ME: I know, I know. When I was in the cult that's what I used to say too... (smug smile) I understand.

    ELDER 2: We keep telling you it's not a cult! Jehovah's people now number more than six million in hundreds of lands all over the earth.

    ME: Wow! It's getting to be a bigcult, isn't it?

    ELDER 1: You bet! I mean, NO! It's NOT a CULT! You know we think those of you who persecute Jehovah's Witnesses are a cult! What do you think of that?

    ME: Well...if I admit I'm in a cult, will you admit you're in one too?

    TOGETHER: NOOO!!!

    ME: Whew! You both said that in perfect cult-like unison. Fascinating to watch cult members. Would you like to come in? I'd like to study you and your cult-think further.

    ELDER 1: We're out of here!

    ELDER 2: Yeah! When Armageddon comes I hope you come running to me. I'll be the one smiling just ouside your door, waiting for Jehovah to destroy you so I can move into your home!

    ME: Bye, cult dudes! Thanks for dropping by. Cult, CULT, C U L T !!!

  • BFD
    BFD

    Don't give it a second thought. You did great. I bet they did pee a little.

    BFD

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