They Walk Among Us (page 2)

wanderlustguy

My favorite is when I have a car in a parking lot, all taped off and ready to spray. I'll be mixing the paint for the bumper of the car I am working on...pouring it into the paint gun. I'll then walk over and start painting the bumper. Then here they come.

Q. Are you painting the car?

A. Yes I am.

Q. Isn't that illegal?

A. Yes, it is, I am an outlaw. I was going to try robbing banks or holding up liqour stores, but that seemed so 15 minutes ago. I decided to risk fines and imprisonment and slather paint on cars for half of what the body shops do...that's my strategy to get rich quick.

wha happened?

I had something similar happen while working in the field years ago. I used to install cell phones in cars. Remember those days. I would do this at the customer's location, home or at the office. Well I would always get the attention of a bored or over zealous security guard. Once while in a large parking garage I was working away and this electric cart with two guards came rushing at me and skidded to a stop. They jumped out and I looked over and just kept working. One looks at the other and states, "Well he's not running, thats a good sign." I retort, "Or maybe I'm just smarter than u are." and continue to work. One asks what I'm doing and I respond that I'm installing a car phone. One of them asks if I had the owners permission. My response? "No, I'm an idiot, because rather than stealing car phones, I waste $1500.00 of my own money installing them into other persons cars without their permission." My coy responses were usually met with blank stares. I would then have them call from my car phone to confirm with the owner of the vehicle that all was well.

momzcrazy

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the
lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up.
She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional
and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, has your plane arrived yet?"

You know what? This woman is me. It had been a long day and I was getting ready to leave. I had been up all night with my daughter, who had an ear infection. So, you know, you make fun of people when you don't know the real circumstances.

I am completely offended that all of you would be like this. I thought this was a place of love and understanding.

momz

Gopher

Sorry momz! (Actually I didn't read the one you were talking about before I commented. But you'll have to admit, most of the OTHER ones were quite alarming. What were these people thinking?)

momzcrazy

Um, Gopher, I was just teasing. Now I am sorry.

BurnTheShips

Here's a funny one by a Beauty contestant. Maybe not much should be expected since it is a "beauty" contest?

Give the poor girl a break! She was nervous and on the spot and choked. LOL

Gopher

<-- woke up early without his sarcasm-radar activated

hillbilly

My wife worked for a state agency as a CSR for a while.

She got to the part with a client were he needed to take a confirmation number or something...

Her, " I will give this number... you need to write this down"

Him.."...ahhnnn,,hmmm You got a pen?.........."

Her..." yes, I have several........"

Him " oh.. can you write this down for me........."

Her (mutes phone)..........."hysterical laughing"

Yep .. they walk among us.

~Hill

Tired of the Hypocrisy

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were
discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier
multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

Ok, that is fine. But why not go back in and get a refund and go grab TEN cases and get a 100% discount?

Satanus

Love em. We went to get a thermos refilled at a coffee joint, tim hortons. The girl said we don't do that.

S

They Walk Among Us

Share this