When we were once Jehovah's Witnesses - we were taught to doubt others " in the world " whose beliefs differed from ours . We were taught to be cynical of any views that didn't harmonize or agree with the Watchtower Societies views . So for years many of us were programmed like this - to keep a closed mind and think that there was only ONE correct way to believe things , and everybody outside that ONE way was full of you know what !
The definition of Cynic in the dictionary is this :" A person who believes all people are motivated by selfishness. And , a member of a sect of ancient Greek philosophers who believed virtue to be the only good and self-control to be the only means of attaining virtue."
In quoting the American Heritage Dictionary it says : " The first use of the word recorded in English , in a work published from 1547 to 1564 , is in the plural for members of this philosophical sect . In 1596 we find the first instance of cynic meaning " faultfinder " , a sense that was to develop into our modern sense. The meaning " faultfinder " came naturally from the behavior of countless Cynics who in their pursuit of virtue pointed out the flaws in others. "
Then, next the definition of Cynical in this same dictionary says : " Scornful of motives, virtue, or integrity of others : a cynical distrust of friendly strangers ; a cynical view of the average voter's intelligence. Expressing or exhibiting scorn and bitter mockery : cynical laughter . " Also under Cynicism it states ; " A scornful , bitterly mocking comment or act . "
Of course : Any of has who have left the witnesses knows it's like talking with a brick wall when trying to reason with them logically - as they are " cult mind controlled " to view things only from ONE perspective without opening their minds up to view things objectively. So - what about us now ? After having left the witnesses, do you find it hard to trust people ? Are you cynical at times toward people in general? Do you feel , because it was drilled into us to doubt others as Witnesses , it is a hangover perhaps from having been trained that way in the Jehovah's Witness cult ?
Whether it is newbies coming on the board, people with various problems in life, or just in day to day living with people in general - do we give people the benefit of the doubt - or without considering the details of people's lives are we quick to doubt them ; because of this view we had for years to " doubt worldy people " ? But let's face it - where else do humans come from to meet up with and share ideas and to be friends with - " in the world ", correct ? Were sure as hell not gonna meet people from Mars or Venus ! LOL!
So to all my friends here on JWD- I trust you all. Most of you are here to discuss things , heal up from getting our rear ends burned by the Witnesses . I genuinely feel that all of our takes make this place what it is. And , personally I have a lot of faith in mankind . I'm not going to let my previous association with a paranoid cult keep me from trusting people " in general ". So, do you think being a witness caused us to have cynical traits at times ? What are your thoughts ? We know the Watchtower lied to us - but will we let that implode us the rest of our lives ? There is a great big world out there to learn about - I for one intend to pursue the learning ! What do you think ? Love your comments folks - look forward to hearing from you ! Peace out to all, Mr. Flipper
Did Being a J W - Cause You to Be Cynical and Doubt Other People ?
by flipper 22 Replies latest jw friends
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flipper
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Bourne
Yes.
But, while being a JW certainly did nothing to help, I have had conversations with an uncle that seems to indicate that I was
naturally distrustful or at least cautious of strangers at a very young age. That said, I FIRMLY believe that being told "five times a week" how worldly
people suck and are doomed to an eternity in Sheol really does a number on a person's trust level. This programming is very difficult to change, especially
when, during the de-programming a "worldly" person cheats or otherwise deceives you. I have to remind myself of how I have also been done wrong by so-called
Christians to realize it doesn't matter what religion, or lack thereof, you are. It all comes down to who you are as a person to begin with.....drawn to do good or
drawn to do bad, which really amounts to how selfish (or selfless) a person you are.
Bourne
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flipper
BOURNE- Great response ! Thanks ! It is true what you say. It was drilled into our heads as witnesses so much to " not trust " worldly people that it is a difficult programming to change ! I think it still affects many ex-JW's today ! I too was cheated on after leaving the witnesses by a non-witness person but it taught me like it taught you that you can get screwed over by people of ALL walks of life - christian, non-christian and in-between. You are right - it comes down to the person himself , is he or her selfish and will hurt people or is he or her selfless who will help people ? ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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flipper
Just wanted to bump this up to see if being in the witnesses caused you to be cynical and/or doubt other people after exiting the witnesses ? Look forward to more responses ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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choosing life
I am not really distrustful or cynical about others. The jws did drill one trait into me though and that was to be friendly, but not friends. Unfortunately, I would never take relationships with "worldly" people to a level of real friendship. It is a very hard habit to break.
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helncon
The jws did drill one trait into me though and that was to be friendly, but not friends. Unfortunately, I would never take relationships with "worldly" people to a level of real friendship. It is a very hard habit to break.
So true.
I find it hard to get to the next level.
Sometimes i find myself being shallow not that i intend to be, just the way i am programed.
Helen
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Maddie
Mr. Flipper - I think that being cynical probably has more to do with disposition, although experiences can induce it. I have experienced many knock-backs in my life by being let down by people I thought I could trust, including the JW's but I don't think I have it in me to be cynical because I always give people the benefit of the doubt. That's not to say that I'm not not more wary now, but generally I want to trust people and believe that there is such a thing as altruism in the world.
Maddie
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quietlyleaving
I just had to go and look up cynicism.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cynicism
Nearly 2000 years after Greek philosophers embraced cynicism, 17th and 18th century writers such as Shakespeare, Swift, and Voltaire used irony, sarcasm, and satire to ridicule human conduct and revive cynicism. Nineteenth- and twentieth-century literary and cinema figures such as Mark Twain, Dorothy Parker, H.L. Mencken, and W.C. Fields used both these modes of perception and other, new ones in communicating their low opinions of human nature. By 1930, Bertrand Russell—in the essay On Youthful Cynicism—was describing the extent to which cynicism had penetrated Western mass consciousness, and noting particular areas where there was much about which to be cynical: religion, country (patriotism), progress, beauty, truth. Certainly, the first half of the 20th century, with its two world wars, offered little hope to people wishing to embrace an idealism diametrically opposed to cynicism: that people can be trusted, have good intentions, are caring, decent, and honourable.
Many felt that the second half of this century was characterized by a general rejection of virtue and self-restraint, and toward materialism—particularly in what Pope John Paul II termed "the cynical society of consumerism" in his 1984 Christmas remarks. The same communications media whose advertising bolstered consumerism also occasionally promoted entertaining conspiracy theories, thus adding a new "hidden agenda" dimension to the cynicism of some. [citation needed]
In recent decades, scientific study of human nature—one book's title characterized it as The Battle for Human Nature [Schwartz]—focused new attention on cynicism. In attempting to counter the widespread belief that "jungle ethics" and the associated competition, self-interest, and survival of the fittest are innate to the human animal, researchers looked for a genetic basis for co-operation and altruistic behaviour, and signs that human societal participation ultimately was built upon them. Some argued that a person's cynicism is escaping responsibility, others argue that cynicism follows sophistication in human psychologic development [Kohn].
I'm glad you allowed for different perspectives.
JW's seem to have taken an extreme postion in order to highlight the fact that they and only they had the truth.
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Devilsnok
I'd go along with this. I am very cynical about people in general. However when i started meeting Ex dubs I noticed that I only saw the good in them, a complete turn around of how i see Worldly people.
Having said that I've now learnt to be cynical about Ex Dubs too
lol
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flipper
Great comments by you folks ! Thanks , I'll reply to each of you.
CHOOSING LIFE- I understand what you are saying. I too had what seemed to be " superficial " friends as a witness - it was conditional on how much field service time I turned in each month ! I was friendly too - but over my witness life only had about a handful, maybe 5 or so what I'd call really close friends while in the organization. I am more open to friendships now having been out of the witnesses for 4 years.
HELNCON- It does take effort to try to get to that next level and be a real close friend. It takes trust and being willing to share our vulnerabilities with others .
MADDIE- I agree with you. I too try to always give people the benefit of the doubt . I too am wary at times but until someone hurts me personally or someone I care for a lot - I assume they have good motives. I'm not cynical - but also I'm not gullible either.
QUIETLY LEAVING- Thanks for posting the Wikipedia info on Cynicsm ! Very interesting and informative ! I agree - JW's get so extreme because they think only they have the truth ! I think a person should be balanced if they are going to be cynical - but not close their minds , but leave their minds open to other possibilities !
DEVILSNOK- It is true - just having been a witness can make us cynical. But since getting myself out of the witnesses - I try to see the good in all people - till they prove me wrong