NEVER get gifts from my hubby!!

by newly unsure 24 Replies latest jw friends

  • newly unsure
    newly unsure

    So tomorrow is my 9th yr Anniversary and my hubby (semi-active JW) has never bought me anything for our anniversary. He may have gotten me a card once or twice. Last year I gave him cufflinks and told him I was getting him something 3 days before our anni. Still nothing! This caused a huge fight started by me obviously. I have a good feeling tomorrow will be the same scenerio. So I wanna know What is up with men raised as JW's? Is this common cuz no other occations get celebrated? Or is my man unique?

  • TheDoctor
    TheDoctor

    As far as i know, anniversaries are usually observed. I hate to say it, but he doesn't have an excuse.

  • Abandoned
    Abandoned

    ((((((((((((newly unsure))))))))))))

    I don't know what his issue is. I always loved giving gifts.

  • ferret
    ferret

    Welcome Newly unsure. It is not a man thing it is just your husband, sorry to say.

    Happy anniversary.

  • moshe
    moshe

    I knew a sister that had an unbelieving husband who finally came into the truth. He was so happy to find out , no more xmas gifts, birthday gifts, etc. He was a real miser and the KH was just where he wanted to be.

  • AudeSapere
    AudeSapere

    My mom said a few times that 'no holiday's' was one of the appeals of the org to my dad.

    She on the other hand always wanted a party. Their anniversary was extremely to her but because they didn't have much money mostly it was celebrated by quiet dinner at home for just the two of them. Splurged on steak and wine.

    Eventually my dad started making money and mom insisted on a present. She gave him something like a week or two notice and made it clear that he would be in BIG trouble with her if he didn't get her something very nice. I think it was for 25 or 30 yr anniversary. Dad claimed that he didn't know what to get so she told him to go ask people. ANYONE. But it had to be good.

    He bought her a nice ring which she then wore for a few years. Until she divorced him.

    So, yes. JWs are mess-up with so many social issues. Gift-giving is just one of them.

    I really think that a book on 'How to be <relatively> Normal After Leaving a Cult' would be beneficial to many of us.

    How to decorate for Christmas. The words to 'Happy Birthday' (haha!). Tipping. Celebration Protocols.

    Happy Anniversary! I *do* hope he comes home with something for you.

    -Aude.

  • serendipity
    serendipity

    You could leave him your wish list along with where to buy the item. Not very romantic, but obviously your man is lazy. Or worse.

    "Wish List for our anniversary tomorrow- pick 1
    1.
    2.
    3.
    4.
    5.

    If I got any one of these items, along with a nice card, I would be so happy. "

  • Es
    Es

    My ex hubby and I always gave each other presents for our anniversary, and either went away or went out for dinner. It was the only thing we were allowed to celebrate so we made the most of it.

    So sorry about your situation that really suxs

    es

  • JWdaughter
    JWdaughter

    My husband is only acquainted with a few JWs, never been in a hall, raised Catholic. Totally lame on the anniversary thing. I am lame on holidays too. I really tried for a few years with the anniversary thing. I have in the last few pretty much given up on getting anything, but I always make a special dinner. He is crazy about any excuse to buy the kids gifts all year around. Why do JWs act like 'worldly' people only give gifts on birthdays and Xmas? I am always trying to STOP him for overdoing it all year with the kids.

    Hey, if he is a good husband otherwise, don't worry about it too much. I hope you have a great anniversary. Be sweet to him anyway-he may get sensitive and thoughtful in his old age and remember fondly how sweet you were anyway. I think ultimatums and threats isn't exactly the way to do this;)

    Happy Anniversary

  • tijkmo
    tijkmo
    JWs are mess-up with so many social issues. Gift-giving is just one of them.

    rubbish sweeping generalization there..

    jws don't have a problem with gift-giving

    some people do - whether jw or not..

    sorry your husband is one of them.

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