The only three reasons to miss a meeting?

by outofthebox 48 Replies latest jw friends

  • DaCheech
    DaCheech

    how about the bethellites that miss the meeting due to the fact that they're working "bethel overtime"?

  • FreedomFrog
    FreedomFrog
    Hm...so being in the throes of labor about to give birth is not a good enough reason either...what a bunch of crap!

    No MrsJones...that doesn't count because then the little tyke can instantly start receiving the "needed" spiritual food when they enter into this world. This reminds me of a pioneer sister telling me a story of her elderly friend that went to the meetings even right when she was very close to death so she wouldn't miss a single meeting. She told me that they rolled her in on her "death bed" ( I kid you not) and finally passed on that week. I was so sick by that comment that I said "well, that's not going to be me!" She looked shocked like as if I was the devil. Hmmm, come to think about it, maybe the elderly died of boredom. (oops, sorry that was mean)

  • GermanXJW
    GermanXJW

    Are JW sisters now giving birth in the kingdom hall? I noticed this does not count as an excuse.

  • outofthebox
    outofthebox

    Again brothers and sisters! How many times should I tell you? Giving Birth doesn't start with F. So it is not a valid excuse. And also, why are you thinking on raising children in this time? The end is neeeeeeeeaaaaaaarrrrrr! Repeat with me! Neeeeaaaarrr! Chant! Neeeaaarrr!

    -ootb

  • FreedomFrog
    FreedomFrog

    Oh, that's right, I forgot....having children in the first place is a sign you're not spiritual enough.

    I think the CO that said the "3 F's" may have said them because it sounds "good to the ear" and so there wasn't much thinking in there like most things are with the Borg.

  • tooktheredpill
    tooktheredpill

    What if you have an appointment in the beauty salon? A "Facial" starts with "F".

    If you are traveling? "Flying" starts with "F".

    "Fornicating" too!!!! :)

  • loosie
    loosie
    Hm...so being in the throes of labor about to give birth is not a good enough reason either...what a bunch of crap

    lol no just go to the KH to have the baby and wait for some MS to come to the back of the hall and tell you to keep your voice down, as you are screaming in labor. I'd grab him by the tie around his neck and ask him if he could keep quiet while pushing out a watermelon.

  • Honesty
    Honesty

    I don't need an "F" to miss a meeting at a kingdom hall.

    All I need is some common sense and then missing a meeting is easy, so easy that I've been missing them since late 1999.

  • garybuss
    garybuss

    After the great disappointment, the end timers originally met to console each other in their grief that the end hadn't come. They were called consolation meetings. I'm not sure when they evolved into sales meetings but that's what they were when I attended.

    * Sunday talk was to maintain belief in the Bible as the authority.
    * The Watchtower magazine study meeting used the Bible to promote the belief that the Watch Tower Publishing Corporation is magically directed and owned by the invisible writer of the Bible.
    * Tuesday night book study is to reinforce belief that the "Society" is God's channel, and ghosts are directing the writers of the literature.
    * The ministry school meeting is to train Sunday speakers and to train recruiters and fundraisers.
    * The "service" meeting is a full blown sales/business meeting. Products used to solicit funds are scheduled, sales presentations are rehearsed and demonstrated, corporate policy is initiated or reviewed, and personnel is added and deleted.

    That's the outline: Establish authority, use established authority to create demand for product, promote product to raise funds, use products to recruit new members, use established authority to keep members from questioning the authority, use shunning at the meetings to coerce compliance from members.

    Without meetings there are no members. Without product, there are no meetings. See how it works?

  • The Oracle
    The Oracle

    Honesty,

    That reminds me of a great quote related to me from a friend of mine. His relative hasn't been to the Kingdom Hall in 15 years and when asked how things are going he can very honestly say...

    "I have not missed a meeting in 15 years."

    It is a beautiful quote.

    The Oracle

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