Funerals

by Xena 25 Replies latest jw friends

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  Xena

  I haven't been to a "worldly" funeral...well ever that I can remember. All the funerals I have been to have been JW ones where they use it as ANOTHER opportunity to preach to everyone in sight. They usually make a token mention of the dead loved one and then begin with the resurrection and earthly paradise and how you have to be a JW to get there.

  Today I went to my aunts funeral. It was beautiful! The priest or whatever he was made a few comments on her life and how she would be missed and then her son got up and gave a talk about his mother...some funny experiences...some heartwarming times...things that brought back memories we all had of the time we spent with her. And I thought to myself "This is what it should be about!" And they ended it with her favorite song by Patsy Cline "Crazy"....

  lol it also prompted me to remember to change my will and make sure I DO NOT HAVE A JW FUNERAL!
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  pettygrudger

  I know what you mean Xena. I just recently attended a funeral for my sis-in-law, and it was beautiful. 10 people stood & read her favorite poems and told stories that showed what kind of person she was. The priest while doing some religious speaking (Catholic) also spoke of his experiences with her and the whole service was about "Katie" as well as hope for the after life.

  Definitely not at your typical JW ceremony and thats too bad. Even in death, one isn't allowed to even be talked of highly - its a shame.
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  4horsemen

  Xena, congrats on the expansion of your awareness.

  Sidenote of curiousity: Did you have a awkward feeling attending a funeral in non Kingdom Hall setting?

  I always felt self conscious guilt on attending functions (weddings, funerals) in "Babylon the Greats" halls. I wonder where that feeling came from?

  Or conveniently getting a hot dog when national anthem was played at a ball game.

  B.F. Skinner must be smiling.
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  Pureheart

  Sorry about you aunt Xena.

  Pureheart
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  tdogg

  My condolences regarding your aunt. I understand your point regarding JW funerals. My aunt burned herself to death. As horrible as that situtation was, they STILL used most of the service to preach at her funeral.
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  Prisca

  Hi Xena,

  Sorry about your aunt, although the funeral for her sounds like the kind I'd like to have.

  I'd like some of my favourite music to be played. I'd also like each attendee to be given a red rose, as a gift from me. A rose, because it's my favourite flower, and red to symbolise the fire and passion that flows in my blood.
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  think41self

  Hi Xena

  I'm sorry about your Aunt sweetie. I am glad you were able to get a different perspective on funerals. I've only been to 2 non-JW funerals. Once when I was a kid I went to a relatives funeral, and I remember being so judgemental of everything they said and did, mostly because I was so afraid to be there. The minister did get the deceased's name wrong though...that was pretty tacky.

  Then last year I went to a funeral of one of my favorite clients...
  and the experience was more like you described it. Everyone shared their memories of this fine lady, the minister gave a very brief prayer and just mentioned her afterlife...that was it...no preaching.
  I found it refreshing, and a healthier way to say goodbye to someone and have some closure.

  Thanks for sharing your experience with us.

  think41self

  Holy Flying Screaming Buddha, Batman!
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  ashitaka

  xena, i know what you mean. when my grandmother died, it was a surreal, beautiful experience to speak of her.....everyone was crying from the joy of her life.....JW's just don't understand love.

  My condolences go out to you.

  ashi
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  DIM

  my "worldly" great grandmother died in July (1 day before my 24th b-day), and the service was held at the funeral home - the talks and eulogies were excellent and loving.

  a sister in my hall had an "unbelieving" mate die last week. I was not at the talk his son gave at my hall on wednesday night, but a good friend of mine relayed back to me that it was basically a preaching ceremony. blah, what a joke.
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  Frenchy

  Funerals are a touchy subject with me. It was a funeral that finally did it for me. I won't post the experience here again but it was the final straw for me.

  JW funerals are cold and leave one feeling empty. It's nothing more than a Sunday talk, one that's been heard for decades and one that is just as empty today as when it was first given.

  When I was doing funerals (I did far more than my share) I never used the Society's outline.

  -Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it-