Is this allowed? I am being ignored by my neighbours and have been gingerly waved to by an elder. Now I haven't heard anything from anyone but is it possible to be disfellowshipped without my knowing? And should I ring someone up and find out?
Disfellowshipped without knowing
by faundy 20 Replies latest jw experiences
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eclipse
Ring a JW friend from your hall that you used to go out in service with...see if they know?
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siy
i would say it may because you have not been to the meeting in some time
you know jws get a 6th sense about theses things.
i get funny looks in the street from time to time, they just dont want to know if there's a problem.
in case it puts them in a uncomfortable position, its just there way of puting there heads in the sand..
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willyloman
Unless your circumstances are unusual, you would know if you were DF'd. You can be DF'd without actualy attending the Judicial Committee hearing, but you would have at least gotten a call or a letter telling you about the meeting.
More likely you are being "marked" by some of the JWs. "Marking" is a dub procedure that is haphazardly applied and little understood by the rank and file (hell, most elder's don't understand the process either). It's supposed to follow a specific talk to the congo and has some rules attached to it but in actual practice, dubs take it upon themselves to institute marking. They pull away socially and may even shun a person whose behavior they view as "unchristian." And in their view, "unchristian" can mean something as minor as missing some meetings or having wordly associates. Dubs are taught to avoid contact with the "spiritually weak" as it can lead to contamination. They are told the elders will "handle" these kinds of cases so there is no need to get involved personally. Different dubs apply this counsel in various ways.
You are being "punished" for what they perceive is bad behavior (otherwise known as independent thinking}.
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Gill
Have you done something that JWs would DF you for?
It could be that they know you don't attend any more and consider you a spiritually dead individual and hence 'invisible' to themselves in their spiritually enhanced position as messengers of the only true religion on the planet. Having ones head up ones own arse in this way can tend to make you 'not see' your former friends and associates in some cases!
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WTWizard
Yes, they sometimes do disfellowship people behind their backs. They may or may not have made an attempt to contact you--they might have left notes and the notes got lost, or they could call on you when you are not home. Then they decide to just go ahead with the hearing.
Occasionally, it's slander. I had an incident of that in the congregation where I went to. One of the members (at that, the only "elder" that I had even the tiniest amount of respect for) was reproved for some bullsxxx. Then, within a year, someone gossiped to me that he had been disfellowshipped when it was only a reproof. I know the most probable source of that slander: the then-lead hounder, who wanted that elder out of the way because he was the only one that didn't want me celibate at all costs and that wanted me to have a shot with the opposite sex (the lead hounder wanted nothing more than for me to do ever more, even more than myself plus kids; the current lead hounder also wanted that for me).
Yes, it's possible if you haven't been at the boasting sessions to have been disfellowshipped behind your back. You could also have been "marked". Also, slander about your being disfellowshipped when in fact you haven't is possible. In either case, you could settle it once for all time by putting up a great big Christmas tree and display in your front yard when you know Brother Hounder is coming. Or, a disassociation letter. That should settle it.
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Shawn10538
I would let it go if I were you. Yes, it most definitely is possible to disfellowship you without your knowledge. But, if it isn't true, the fact that you are poking around trying to find things out (your status to be specific) will raise some doubts in their minds. They will wonder, "What did you do wrong that you are wondering if you are disfellowshipped?" Then they will put a target on you and start an investigation. Remember the scripture, "Those having xdealings with stupid ones will fare badly." Every contact you have with JWs regardless of the context, will be like touching a curse. Things will start going badly for you. They will hurt you in some way, be assured of this. Best keep your distance.
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LennyinBluemont
Well, Gill finally explained why they don't "see" us anymore. It is mighty dark up there, ain't it?
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changeling
My guess is you are not DF'd. Running into a fader makes witnesses uncomfortable and they don't know how to act.
They may be thinking: "Hmmm... I havn't seen this person at the meetings in a long time. I wonder if they were DF'd and I did not hear about it? I'd better not say hello just in case..."
changeling
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AK - Jeff
It has been done. Some have stated that they were df'd years back without being informed. It is rare I believe.
Part of the explanation is that some jw's may wonder if they missed the meeting where you were df'd, and to stay on Jehovah's good side, don't want to risk open communications. Besides, the shunning often extends freely to others who have just faded away. Can you feel the love?
Jeff