well i had another dream of my family last night. i hate those because then the rest of the day i can't stop thinking of them. In the dream me and my entire family all 8 of us were sitting at dinner in this nice resturant and i look at my mom and say so how do i look a year later? (they haven't seen me for a year) she looks at me with discust and says... "ugh, how can i put this? You've gained a lot of weight" and i looked at her and said "I'll have you know that that's just because i'm happy, something you will never Feel!" and i stormed out. In the same dream my sister was chasing me and climbed up a to the balcony of my room and fell and died. What's going on with my freakin head!!!????!!!!???!!! So do these dreams mean in my subconsious i still miss them and want their acceptance? I loath alllll of them!
does this mean i miss them still?
by Missanna 18 Replies latest jw friends
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Gopher
I've read that dreams are a process where your subconscious mind puts together all different combinations of things, past and present - perhaps to resolve a concern. Often people say "let me sleep on it" before making a decision. The brain puts together various thoughts and ideas and sometimes you wake up just knowing what you should do. Sometimes not.
In my dreams I see people from my life, past and present -- sometimes even somebody from my childhood whom I haven't thought about for years. I don't really miss those people from the past, it's just that I remember them somehow.
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educ8self
Maybe, but there is a difference between caring about them and missing and wanting their approval. So that wouldn't mean you condone the kind of things they do and what they believe, it's more along the lines of natural affection if anything - something many JWs have suppressed.
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Missanna
I don't want or need their acceptance in my life. but it's frustrating because i keep having these type of dreams. i think my brain is telling me to deal with it!
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nvrgnbk
You're a tough girl, Missanna.
You so got that!
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educ8self
Well lets make some specific distinctions, do you feel that way about them as people or as relatives? I mean you look at how many people have issues over relatives who are still in, it's obvious there may be something on that level. Again you may care about them on a deeper level, and it's just natural to want to relate with them - but that's not about their acceptance.
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educ8self
Let me put it this way - acceptance isn't even about who they are, not really. It's just a set of judgements right? Although they might be so deeply in that it appears they are that set of beliefs and judgements, both to themselves and to others, on a more basic level they are just people, and they're your relatives.
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greendawn
There is probably a sentimental part of yourself that still feels attached to them and misses them but the way is forward, as you build a new social life and acquaintances they will soon become a thing of the past even at that sentimental level.
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journey-on
Missanna
If you wake up with a dream imprinted thoroughly on your mind, it’s telling you something you need to understand. It is not a simple "review of the day" type dream. This one is going deeper.
Everything in a dream has meaning. Some symbols are universal, some are cultural, and some are for you personally. Without knowing you, it’s difficult to interpret everything with total accuracy.
You left out some details that would be necessary for a good dream analysis, but based on just the information given, here is my take:
The dining table represents the family unit. You are altogether as One unit. After all, you ARE a family and nothing can change that.
You initiated the exchange between your mother and yourself, so this is an unresolved issue that YOU have. You want feedback from your mother. You want her to look at who you are today and speak to it. You want her to acknowledge YOUR LIFE and what and who you are TODAY. You are still a part of the family (you still sit at the dining table) and you want her to acknowledge that.
She does acknowledge it, but she does so in a negative way. Rather than happily accepting what you have chosen for your life, she criticizes you. It saddens and angers you that she can’t accept you for who you are and the choices you’ve made for yourself.
You rage at her answer and storm out. You are the one that backs away from the table. You are the one that chose to pull away without finishing the conversation and seeking to resolve the animosity and tension between you two.
Now the next part of your dream is incomplete. When your sister chases you, is she chasing you in anger or out of concern for you being upset? This is a vital piece to this dream puzzle? So, without knowing her state of mind, it’s difficult to interpret, but I’ll try.
This constant effort to unite her family is KILLING your sister. She loves you and is the one coming to you, the one climbing the ladder to YOUR balcony. Is she reaching out to you? Are you pushing her away? Does she get just close enough, then falls back down to square one?
Without knowing all the dynamics in your family, this part of the dream is cloudy. But, I think your issues are unresolved and the way you are dealing with them is by "storming out", leaving them all behind, and pushing away those in the family that may desire a closer relationship.
Could it be that out of 8 people in your family, you can be close to at least one? If you would like to pm me with additional details, I may be able to give you some better insight.
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educ8self
I was going to post this in a new thread, but since that doesn't seem to be working I guess this is as good a place as any.
You can look at how people deal with stuff in three ways: Ignoring it, working around it, or going into it. Ignoring it is pretty simple, it's different in working around it in that you are distancing yourself, just walking away from it all. Obviously, nothing gets addressed or worked out.
When you work around it, you know it's there and take the thing into consideration - that's basically what faders are doing when they have relatives close by. But again, the whole thing is there in tact so it doesn't really get addressed then either.
If you go into it, then you are really looking at how it all works, what makes it tick, and that's when real change can happen. More often than not it's probably a combination, like someone can go into it to some degree but really do a lot of working around so they can preserve some aspect of their life. If you really go into it, there may be consequences in terms of things falling apart - but it is thoroughly addressed, inside and out. Of course you can just look into it without doing anything, but we tend to want to do both. Besides, we may not see some things until we take action sometimes. Anyway, hope this is helpful.