If ur child died,would u visit the grave and always "talk" to them?

by fedorE 22 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  LovesDubs

  I couldnt bear the thought of burying one of my children. I would have them cremated and kept with me. And I would talk to them as I do believe there is an energy that remains. We dont understand it...but then what is this force that keeps us functioning in our bodies? I have told my children repeatedly not to bury me but to cremate me and scatter my ashes on the sea. So they wouldnt feel obliged to visit anywhere and they could live anywhere they wanted without giving my remains any thought.

  A couple years ago, a dear friend of my son's, only a month after she got her license at age 16, was killed in a car crash. A tragic, avoidable death in an unclearly marked road construction zone. I have never seen such an outpouring of grief from a community, and the inconsolable grief of my son and his friends over her death. And they saw how easily it could happen to them. It was very sobering. They tried so hard to "replace" her at her moms home...spending nights there, cleaning for her, being teenagers around her...but there was nothing they could do to assuage the loss for that mom. I never got to meet the mom. I went to the memorial they had at the high school, which was packed to the rafters with kids wearing pink shirts with her name on them. The mother actually found the courage to talk to us, and she said "people keep telling me she is in a better place now...she is NOT in a better place! She was LOVED here! CHERISHED here and she should BE here! God should NOT have taken my baby! She didnt DESERVE this!" And it was all I could do to not run hysterical from there thinking of my own children. Nothing on the planet matches that grief.

  I hope to God I NEVER have to deal with that...because I wouldnt be able to.
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  SPAZnik

  LovesDubs, I feel ya.
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  orangefatcat

  If I were to loose my child I would have him cremated and keep his ashes. This I have done with my husbands ashes. I have one large urn and the small urn and this is the one that some day I hope to take to Greece and his ashes over the Mediterranean Sea. I know he is in a far better place a place somewhere in the vastness of God's great universe. Be it heaven or another planet. I often feel the energy of something in my home and I am certian it is Marco's or my guardian Angel I don't fear this energy, It comforts me and when I feel it I talk to it. I know some of you may think that I am bizarre but I feel completely normal and have all my mental facilities in place. It is a pleasant feeling to feel this warm closeness. In fact sometimes I thought my son was here and went to say something to him only to recall he wasn't here but at his home.

  I know if my child/children were in a gravesite I would visit it and would know that all the remains are ashes and bones, but if it comforts me to be there for clousure or just to talk to my child then why not. I is theraputic for some, some can't let go and for them it is their comfort. I know when I have visited my grandparents grave and my great grandparents my aunt talks about them and the things we remember about them and there lives. We say things to them as well. We also tidy up around their sites. They all were soldiers in WW2 except for my grandma's but they did their part for the war effort. I miss them all very much but I know in my heart I shall see them again. I know that and believe that with all my heart. In life they were the most wonderful human beings alive. They made me what I am today. And it had nothing to do with the JW's because they weren't JWs they were there for me when I was growing up in my formative years until I nearly 13 so I had some beautiful teachers and loving grandparents who taught my to love God my neighbour, our country and then the destitute and unfortunate people of the world. They all taught me how to pray. I loved them so much and that is why I hated being a JW because it forced me to relinquish my rights as a child of God who worshipped already as an Anglican and was forced to be a witness. I was a rebel and didn't want that to happen. But my parents won, ,,and grandma was livid.

  Oh well.

  Lets just make every effort while our loved ones are alive to love them with all our hearts and if they die we won't ever have to feel any guilt and if for some reason our loved ones spurn us don't blame yourself it is they who choose this course and blaming your self won't change how they felt.

  Orangefatcat

  This is a great thread thanks for starting it.

  Orangefatcat.