You mention the possibility of our children shunning us, they would only have to shun us if we left officially. A few years of slowing down will I hope open the way to no shunning. We have no intention of officially leaving the Organization, that is not an option.
In all honesty, Mr Scully and I tried that route. We succeeded in flying under the radar for several years, only because we moved to another congregation and circuit. Once we relocated again, a JW relative put a bug in the ear of the local elders and they eventually found a way to create an excuse for us to be shunned by our JW relatives, even though we have not officially left either. It's all about being perceived as a "good association" or not, and how much pressure is put on family members in terms of what "privileges" they will be allowed to have if they choose your association over "loyalty to the Organization." We actually found out a year after the fact, that the elders announced that Mr Scully had disassociated himself, when he did nothing of the sort.
Don't trust the elders. They do not have your family's best interests at heart, and they will do whatever they deem necessary to force the issue of "loyalty".