I'm in love and ... scared !!!

by RAF 32 Replies latest social relationships

  • RAF
    RAF

    I sure fell that you are romantic and very sensitive in heart Codeblue ... and in fact I'm very romantic too, I mean this is not the first time, I feel good and even in love with someone, but it's the first time I feel very different (maybe because the specific feeling that I have is new).

    About myself (being revealed - it will happen) and it is an issue to take into consideration here ... even if I don't think I need to be the most interesting person in the world at all, since I just feel good being myself ... Of course I'm far from being perfect (more over about what a man could expect from a wife), I'm trying to not regress though about what seems really important to me, but this only depends on my personnal values which can change.

    If you meet me in real life for only lets say once to 3 times for a few hours you'll only see a quiet or (depending on the context) a kind of childish woman (and somehow I'm really still 12 in many matters in my ways).

    So now even if we saw each other way more than 3 times + the phone call (I don't think it's equal as to sharing enough time to have an idea of who I am) I mean he sure doesn't know yet who he is dealing with (as well as I don't know about him) and if he only saw the childish woman in me, that could explain a lot of things.

    To be more explicite (in being professionnaly an accountancy expert - that's why we've met) he runs his own every saturday Party club - located on a boat (the one my sister and I are going most often on saturdays since he invited me and that it's close, that we really do appreciate the music and ambiance there).

    But what do I do there ? ...Just having fun ... So what he sees the most is probably the childish woman in me. And the funny part of this, is me being sensitive to his ways related to the feeling that it gives me, it's getting me confused to the point I'm probably reacting in a childish way with him (being confused to the point to not find my words on the phone for instance, really, that's not me - What else have I done exactly which looks like that? I don't know).

    So ... Maybe he sees a woman that he might be able to mold his way (not really my type - and this is not the kind of man I want) ... if it's related to that dissapointement is on the way ... but at the same time him being able to make me feel good to the point I've considered huge involvements (like marriage and a kid) talks about his potential on being able to get way more than I thought I could give ... but we are not there yet (really NOT).

    That said he also have some childish ways and it's cute as hell !!! I can also see and feel a lot of defaults in him but that doesn't bother me at all ... it just looks like part of him ...

  • ninja
    ninja

    you may feel romantic now....think 6 months down the line when he is farting in your face and leaving his underpants in the bathroom ...along with the toilet pan seat up.....I know this will certainly happen because....ahem....someone told me they did it.....I would never do a thing like that.....muhahahaha

  • RAF
    RAF

    ... ninja

    To be honest by now (and if this goes farther) I don't think I am ready to live with someone I have such involvement with full time ... I'm more for "you stay in your home and I stay in mine" (and maybe even with a kid it could stay this way, I guess it would more depends on the kids needs and his for me to really want to get into this).

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