Advice wanted... possible stalker

bluesbreaker59

Ok,

So over the last couple days, I've been getting messages on myspace from someone that wants to know "What band I play with?" and "When I'll be somewhere next?" I have not answered these questions with direct answers, because I'm pretty sure its a fake profile with someone from my past operating it. This has happened before, where my ex, tried to be added as a friend to my page, and I knew it was her. This time, the writing style is the same, and so is the language used, no profile pics, no friends, same scenario. I don't understand what she hopes to gain from this. Here's why:

1. We've been seperated for two years, and divorced since fall of 2005

2. I'm DF'd for sleeping with my girlfriend in 2007, so that gave her grounds to do whatever, though she doesn't go to meetings.

She was the one that got me DF'd, by going through my email (I never changed my password, MY fault). So I just don't see what she has to gain from all this. Any thoughts??? I understand her being ticked about me trying to get her DF'd for cheating on me, but that's JW rules, and she was staying with some guy alot. She denied it, and I got fed up and just stopped trying to prove it. Then she got me, and I figured that would be enough, but then the other day I get this on myspace, and I'd bet anything its her.

RAF

just ignore ... (in every ways)

MadTiger

Option #1: Continue to ignore her. She is an "ex" for a reason.

Option #2: Tell her you suspect it is her again, and explain why it is not going to happen.

jgnat

She was the one that got me DF'd, by going through my email (I never changed my password, MY fault). So I just don't see what she has to gain from all this. Any thoughts???

She still loves/hates you. Love and hate are very closely related. The opposite of love is apathy, and she's definitely not that. Don't reply to the myspace stalker. Send your ex some flowers with a one word note, "Friends?".

deaconbluez

I've dealt with this sort of problem a few times over the past few years, and once again very recently. You have to be very clear with them and use very direct, piercing language that gets the point across. You can't underestimate this kind of thing, either. People kill over this kind of stuff every day.

megsmomma

I think as humans we are curious creatures.....and she just may want to peer into your life just to see what you are doing now. I think if I knew a way to peer into the lives of people I used to know, I would. (Besides going so far as trying to find out if they are on myspace, or things like that...I am not that worried about it..LOL)

drew sagan

Good points jgnat

RAF

Deaconbluez : You have to be very clear with them and use very direct, piercing language that gets the point across. You can't underestimate this kind of thing, either. People kill over this kind of stuff every day.
OY OY OY it's true ... (for those who kill for that not sure being very clear would change something) ... but if she's not that kind (which luckily is the case) maybe being very clear without being mean - just telling that enough is enough - to let time do it's job to be able (both of you) to appreciate again the time you shared together and also the reason why you are not together anymore, would be the best for both ... otherwise it doesn't lead anywhere but frustration for her since she is the one who is insisting (it does not allow you to miss her - but just being bothered). I guess that the reason why she is still playing game is just because she haven't find anything really satisfying yet ... tell her to put her energy into that because you want the best for her and obviously it's not you (something like that)

and yeah ad Jgnat's idea ... all that with a nice card (with roses or something which talks about the benefit of friendship)

SPAZnik

Have you considered saying, "who is this?"

RAF

SPAZ : Have you considered saying, "who is this?" Yeah ... (right !!! I guess you should try this at first).

Advice wanted... possible stalker

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