by RichieRich 37 Replies latest jw friends
Criminals? I never understood until I sat amongst them in a county jail holding cell. No one ever plans to be there, its all a lack of foresight and bad luck thrown in a blender.
Were you arrested at one time? Maybe I missed it in one of your previous posts.
i think i kind of know what your going through richie. as i look back on myself just a few years ago, i can't believe what an asshole i was. i still do and say stupid things i shouldn't, and have to fight to kep an open mind. sometimes, people will say something, and as the words are about to come out, i have to catch myself and really think about my phylosophies. i now have gay friends, and have to keep from saying something that's upsetting to them, even though by nature, i am confrontational, and closed minded. now, i fight to stay open minded, and am much happier. of course, when people mess you over, it makes it harder to trust. i have trust issues. i will be cool to people, but, can honestly say i only trust about 10 people. everyone else, i am careful with.
I haven't read all the posts so forgive me if I am repeating....
perhaps it's intuition?
I usually tell people that I think I have an especially sensitive bullshit detector after leaving a life totally full of bullshit.
I try not to judge people right away. talk a little, get to know them. I don't let anyone in right away. I think it's a way of protecting yourself but I think all people do this more or less - whether you were a wit or not.
don't be hard on yourself. james thomas would probably say " sit back - observe yourself doing this, and say - hmmm. isn't that interesting." no need to judge youself about it.
peace and love richie man!
Mum,
I'm an ESTJ. I was an ESTP early in high school, but I got re-evaluated later on. It makes perfect sense for me.
Were you arrested at one time? Maybe I missed it in one of your previous posts.
Yeah, it was a bar incident gone bad, I was in the right and all charges were dropped, but it was a learning experience for sure.
From Richie: "What happens when I want out? I'm bound in the walls that I myself built."
I was going to comment on this but I found that JamesThomas already did, and much more eloquently than I ever could, but I'll add a few of my own. There is profound wisdom in his words and if you stop a moment and ponder them you will sense this yourself. Notice all of the IDEAS that you struggle with are constructions of the mind revolving around your own IDEA of who you take yourself to be. That idea is just another construction, or a "box" as JamesT has said. Find the origin of this box, see if its real or only imagined. What you are left with when imagination of "me" isn't attended to is the "real" you. Therein lies the answer to every question of separation and fear, struggle and wholeness. You ARE what is sought - not your idea of "you" but the essence in which that idea arises.
I guess it depends what category you put me into :-D
Mysterious, there is only one category for you and that is Mysterious.
On the other hand I must still be in the apathy category, not worth a response.
Philip
My opinion; it doesn't matter how bright you are, you're just as vulnerable to the rejection you've had to suffer from all the people you thought you could trust. It's going to be hard to trust people for a while, maybe for life. That doesn't matter very much, it's only a diminished naivety about humanity. I think you're better off picking who you want in and who you want out of your life.
