Someone is Lying.....

by R.F. 27 Replies latest jw experiences

  • R.F.
    R.F.

    So my ex called a little while ago. She said she was calling to check on me out of concern. I've been to 2 meetings in a month. At first she was asking about how I had been feeling and then came the inevitable guilt trip. She started grilling me about coming to the meetings. Now even if I was still mentally in the org I still would have missed all those meetings, simply because of the different physical problems I had been having over the last month because of all the things going on lately. She was saying how I was isolating myself from everyone in the congregation, accusing me of leaving the meetings super fast to avoid them. I went to the meeting thursday and stayed afterwards to fulfill my congregation assignment, there was plenty of opportunity for anyone to talk to me, but only she and one other person did. She said that others are trying to contact me to check on me, and from the way she described it you'd think that my phone was ringing off the hook, but that isn't so. There are only a few that have called me and I don't have many missed calls, so someone is lying here, trying to give off the impression that they're extremely concerned.

    The entire way she talked to me was in a strong tone. She makes it seem like i'm becoming the most horrible person in the world, saying that she's afraid of the person i'm turning in to......all because i've missed alot of meetings. I haven't even talked to her much since the break-up so there's no way to judge my character. I told her to read Galatians 5:22-23 and see if based on that if i'm lacking spirituality.

    That's one thing that really gets to me at times. A person's entire personality is based on their meeting attendance.

    So now i'm ducking and dodging everyone allegedly when the fact is there is nothing to dodge. So like i've already said, there are obviously some lies going on from SOMEONE here. I was defending myself to her and we even got into a bit of an argument during the convo but that got patched up. Then I thought.."Why in the hell am I taking that crap from her??"

    Dealing with JWs is truly a unique experience. Enough to make you go looney!!!

    R.F.

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    A month! That is like a nanosecond in Jehovahs time!

    It would be nice if they were concerned for you as a person and not a meeting attender.

    Your whole world as you knew it, before your BIL death, has changed. Even if you were not having the negative feelings you are about the borg, this is a huge adjustment time for you and your family.

    I am sorry you are going through this right now.

    purps

  • greendawn
    greendawn

    The JWs are that way they show interest in a person only when that is ultimately in the interests of the org they serve otherwise the typical dub doesn't really care much about other dubs there is no real brotherly love. Neither does the org itself care about its members.

    They also judge heavily a person by the amount of preaching they do, someone that doesn't promote the WT gospel becomes morally invalidated whatever else s/he does that is highly commendable.

  • choosing life
    choosing life

    I think sometimes that people forget about caller ID. I was told others were trying to reach me by phone, but there were no calls recorded.

    Hope things look up for you soon. Sincerely, Choosing Life

  • Frank75
    Frank75

    Dude! She's your X! Things like this can be toxic and harmful to you.

    You really gotta ditch her and move on IMHO. There is no way a call like that should last longer than 30 seconds!

    Frank75

  • R.F.
    R.F.

    Thanks for the PM purps.

    It's like over a month ago I was supposed to be this super-spiritual person that everyone looked up to, but now that meetings have been missed i'm supposed to be spiritually weak. She keeps quoting the Scripture in Proverbs that speaks against isolating yourself. I'm not isolating myself. I have my loving family. I don't recall in the Bible it saying that you lose God's approval by missing assembly with fellow believers.

    R.F.

  • RollerDave
    RollerDave

    Well, I think she MIGHT actually care about you as a person, but unfortunately it's that superficial caring through a WT lens darkly that they have reduced their abilities to.

    If you don't use it, you lose it, and thinking that 99 percent of the world is going to be killed by Jah does tend to take it down a notch.

    Also, I don't have to tell you that JW's have this psychopathic way of believing their own BS as the say it; she is either using this dubious talant, or simply relaying what her handlers want her to say.

    It could be, if you will pardon the pun, a game of telephone where as the info passes from one to another it changes subtly.

    I personally lean towards thinking there's a handler there with her telling her what to say and they were trying to sound you out.

    In any case, you are fading so well, don't let them trip you up!

    Just keep it up and soon they'll come looking and not see you cuz you faded!

    Roller

  • R.F.
    R.F.

    It could be, if you will pardon the pun, a game of telephone where as the info passes from one to another it changes subtly.

    I personally lean towards thinking there's a handler there with her telling her what to say and they were trying to sound you out.

    Interesting observation Dave. I've been trying to rely more on my gut lately, and it hasn't seemed to let me down yet, but that thought sure did run through my mind a few times. It's like she was making statements of conclusion that I know she couldn't have come up with herself. Simply because of the fact that it wouldn't make sense from her point of view. But like you said, I think she does genuinely care. She's just affected by the JW mindset.

    And Frank I think you're right. Someone else told me the same thing. I guess that's why I felt so stupid after talking with her so long, that I went through all that for nothing.

    R.F.

  • free2think
    free2think

    She has no right to question you, imho she seems to be using your past feelings/relationship/history to guilt trip you. She is trying to pretend nothing has happened and that you have no valid reason to not be at the kingdumb hell, even though she must know all the things that have happened in your family recently.

    I'm sorry R.F.

    hugs

  • Vernon Williams
    Vernon Williams

    Hang tough.

    Wishing you strength and patience,

    V

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