My dad passed away in December and I had to fly to South Africa for his funeral. Both my parents and just about all the extended family are devout Witnesses. The funeral talk was held at the local KH. The talk itself was the worst I have ever heard - complete without any emotion whatsoever, however although I am disfellowshipped - almost everyone in the congregation came upto me shook my hand and gave me their condolensces. Some even chatted about my dad and mentioned how much they loved him and what a wonderful man he was. I was surprised and taken back by the concern and warmth shown. My brother and sister who are also devout Witnesses and very active in their congregations were also very warm and loving and it was good catching up with them also.
SURPRISED AND SHOCKED
by Raphael 17 Replies latest jw experiences
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Bumble Bee
I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your father.
The "Society" really needs to do something about their "standard" funeral outlines.
When my father passed away, my brother was DF'd at the time, and pretty much everybody talked to him, hugged him and offered condolences. The only one that didn't was my fathers brother, an elder in his cong. He just looked at my brother and said "You know what you have to do". Cold, heartless bastard!
BB
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Vernon Williams
Empathy on the loss of your Dad: I lost mine in eighty two.
I am glad the JWs at the funeral went past cult control and, for a momment, demonstrated human kindness.
Now, things can get back to normal......
Take care,
V
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dedpoet
(((((Raphael)))))
I am so sorry to hear of your loss.
At least your relatives were prepared to lay aside watchtower rules
on this sad occasion. -
Gopher
Raphael,
Sorry to hear of your loss.
My JW grandmother passed away last fall.
My JW parents also set aside their reservations about talking and eating with me and my sister, for one day. It was shockingly normal. Then, the next day, the Witness wall went back up. Like my mom had said a few years back, they'd only contact us in "dire circumstances". This was the first time they really talked to me in the 21st century.
Not surprisingly, the funeral talk was the standard-issue JW outline, with 2 minutes about her life (read from the inside of the small memoriam they printed about her life), and 25 minutes about Watchtower doctrine. The non-JW's there were not amused.
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Raphael
I had one elder come up to me and say "you know what you have to do" is that a standard line they are given by the KGB to pass on to thos who are d'fd...man it's all so schizophrenic , I know that now they would all go back to the shunning thing should I see any of them again or attend another meeting! I think most JW;s are just ordinary folks, but completely under the spell of the GB. Very sad actually .
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anewme
Yes sorry Raphael about your dad, but glad the funeral for him was such a nice experience for you.
The added shunning treatment that some have experienced, at already sad family funerals, is disgraceful behavior from those who call themselves followers of Christ.
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emptywords
sorry about you're dad... but true what you say about after the funeral they go back to the shunning thing. What this shunning thing is to them is that, by shunning it may move the disfellowshiped b/s to shame and want to repent and come back, by ignoring them they are not condoning their sin, because the disfellowshiped person has not repented otherwise he/she would be part of the Congo and approved to witness house to house, give talks, answer up whatever....it is uppity and cruel.
This shunning does nothing but push people away and betrays all that Christ taught about love, forgivness and humility.
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ex-nj-jw
So Sorry to hear about your dad (((((((((((((((((Raphael)))))))))))))
nj
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sammielee24
Sorry about your dad but I'm glad that everyone else was kind and compassionate to you. That helps.
When one of my family members died 2 years ago, we went to the funeral. Not one person spoke to us out of about 200 people and despite this being family, we were handed a note by one of them, that informed us that we were not welcome to visit the family. We had flown 3,000 miles to attend the funeral of a close family member, so we turned around and flew right back without ever speaking to anyone. swife.