Crises of Conscience

by ex-nj-jw 24 Replies latest jw experiences

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  WTWizard

  I bought that book from www.freeminds.org . I also read it, and it told me nothing that I couldn't have figured out from my personal integrations between experiences and what I saw on other apostate Web sites. The organization is a criminal organization that has the potential to start off a second Dark Ages if left unchecked.

  I was already mad at the organization before buying the book. You see, they did their utmost to make sure I would not meet the opposite sex. They would try to get me rejected by the whole opposite sex at assemblies by telling the hounder-hounder to spread rumors behind my back throughout the circuit. All they had to do was tell them that my hours in service should be double what they are or some BS like that, and it would have worked. Of course, I had no direct way of knowing what was going on.

  Then, after pulling this, they told me to just stick with other men. Basically, that shut off any and all impetus for me to continue. It also gave away their ploy to keep me single, presumably so that they could get me to do more than myself plus kids (I don't remember what scripture that came from, but it was a misapplication of a scripture where someone would die single and be better at carrying on the name alone than with kids). Of course, since it's mathematically impossible to do more than yourself plus kids, and especially after 40 or 50 generations pass, I didn't buy it.

  Instead, I began blowing off meetings. I moved into a border between two congregations, and started missing meetings and letting each congregation think it was the other's job to hound me. Service time went down (so much for accomplishing more than myself plus kids). Eventually, I stopped totally (The Fade). Since they cut off any good from attending meetings, I really don't give a rat's @$$ about getting disfellowshipped; I just want them to waste more time trying to hound me. And I got the Crisis of Conscience book as a slap in their face.

  Of course, there are other slaps in their face coming. Besides posting on apostate forums, I have ordered Christmas decorations and plan to put them up this fall. I also bought a Ouija board, the filthiest rap I could get my mitts on, and just about everything else they demonize (and I have yet to have even one lousy demon attack me). Of course, I haven't put a penny in the contribution boxes in I don't remember how long.

  The moral: You treat me like dirt, you keep me from finding a marriage partner, and you can expect to pay a very heavy price.
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  writetoknow

  Me too of course I analysis everything to death after being a witnesses I finally conclude I am pissed at myself. I was super duped and liked it! Once you lose faith in your own judgment it make you distrust everything and everybody.

  What really upsets you is to know the bible enough to realize that we were taught that all human arrangements would be exposed and people would lose faith in everything toward the end. Jeeeee! Look like we are going through what we wanted all other religions to go through, but not us!

  It's really bad when you know in your heart all this is right and just exactly what we all really knew but the brain over powers reasonable thought. I think most of us like being control and the abuse because of insecurity and that is enough to make you anger. Not only did I like the control I controlled and it makes me sick everytime I have to recall my self-righteous stupidity.

  The book just destroyed me at first because I realized I had hurt so many people. Next I realized we can justify anything with the bible. Finally God put me in contact with people that had child like faith and I started to realize they had more love for God in there little finger then I did in my whole body.

  But I got it finally if God had not let all this happen plus it was what I needed in my life at the time I would not really know him now.
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  garybuss

  I'll tell ya how stupid I am. I read Crisis Of Conscience and then I went to the Witness people to confirm if what I had read was true. BIG MISTAKE! No Witness took time to try to answer even one of my questions, they just dispensed with me.
  
  It all made me sort of think there just might have been a few grains of truth in that book.
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  TheCoolerKing

  Especially after I read that the GB would make important issues based on a 2 / 3 majority vote! And here I thought that they prayed all night before they carefully came to a wise decision...NOT!!!

  I was especially surprised to hear about the ones that slept through the discussion and then woke up to vote, or who had not considered the topic to be discussed before the meeting, no Bible study before hand, just going with the party line... This is supposed to be Jehovah's spirit-led organization, carelessly making decisions and policies that affect the minute details of their followers lives??

  Maybe they prayed before they voted, one has to vote to see if they are in agreement by the majoriity, how do we know if they prayed.

  It's very unlikely that they gave much thought to many important issues. Like Truthsearcher said, and as Ray wrote in his book, "How can you pray about an issue the night before, if you dont know what it is till the day of the meeting???" (Or if youve slept through the discussion, for that matter...)

  TCK
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  greendawn

  So ex nj in a few words what are the major points that strack you the most as being revealing about their true nature. Most people were totally scandalised by the Malawi Mexico discrepancy in Mexico the dubs could buy a party card to escape persecution because that would save the properties of the org there from confiscation. That shows how much of a business they are and how much they think of their followers.