G'day all,
I've come to this thread a little late and have been very interested in all the comments, most of which I would support.
Before 'diving in' I must reiterate that the judicial process of JWs is unscriptural. Sure, the WTS may point to the 'handling' of gross sinful behaviour in the first-century congregation, but nowhere in their publications can they point to the judicial committee process per se. In fact, other aspects of the Witness judicial process is unscriptural e.g. restrictions which are nowhere mentioned in the NT and especially for those who have been re-instated.
So whenever we discuss anything to do with DF/DA IMO we must firstly point out to JWs the unscripturalness of the whole process.
That having been said, Had Enough is experiencing the very thing that the GB claim it does not do i.e. split/divide families. The standard response by Dubs is "you made the choice", "you brought it on yourself", "we're not the ones who caused your trouble, it's you who turned your back on Jehovah", etc. Of course this is a specious argument. A dub who shares in the shunning process is responsible for their own actions. He/she is doing the action of shunning. They cannot put the blame for their behaviour on to someone else. Remember how Adam is recorded as saying "It's not my fault, God, that I sinned. It's your fault for giving me this woman." A Witness who shuns chooses to do so. Of course, much pressure is brought to bear on the dubs to carry out the shunning arrangement with the threat of their own ostracising.
So, Had Enough, you poor daughter is responsible for her actions. Sadly she is influenced to believe that she is being loyal to Jehovah when really she is being loyal to an imperfect organisation of imperfect men with imperfect laws. Let us hope that you can sow seeds of doubt in the organisation in your daughter's mind.
How terrible it is for families to be divided in this way with the organisation coming between a family and their heavenly Father. I assume that this situation affects family get-togethers. Does your daughter attend? Does she come if her brother doesn't? What will happen if, and when, there is a death in the family? Where will the funeral be? Will they all come?
Mrs Ozzie and I face the very same as you do in this and we extend our great sympathies to your family.
You asked if the shunning causes people to miss their families and does this make the DF one see the "error of their ways"? An interesting question. I look back over 35 years of sharing on judicial committees and the persons who I have shared in re-instating. I guess the elders are faced with a very difficult task. (Why wouldn't they, when the process is wrong?) You see, the elders have to determine whether a DF person is truly repentant. Thier manual (commonly called the "Flock" book) instructs them to look for works of repentance. Basically this amounts to meeting attendance and/or restitution. In short, it's personal bias on the part of elders that would prevent a person being re-instated. I have known of people being re-instated out of 'kindness' so that they could attend a wedding in a Kingdom Hall, or so that a family be "together again in the truth".
So does the DF process help a person see the error of their ways? It might, but only if they still believe the WTS religion is 'the Truth". Quite often, as can be seen in the posts in this thread, the shunning process only causes a person to have doubts that the religion is "the Truth" and causes them to re-evaluate their faith. This is what we see time and again in the posts on this board.
Elders sharing in judicial committees should be aware of this, as well as that they are being asked to participate in an unscriptural process that causes more harm than good.
As a footnote, and for the benefit of the Fred Hall types, I personally am not DF/DA and so my comments are based on my conscientious observations over many years of sharing in 'the thick of things'. So it is not simply a DF person "grizzling", which is often the retort made by dubs to such criticisms.
Mrs Ozzie and I send greetings.
Cheers,
Ozzie
"It's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness."
Anonymous