My God I thought I was going to have a heart attack! Why didn't someone warn me there was going to be a talk on "how to identify an apostate" tonight?
Well I am just lucky the brother didn't mention the tell tale signs of firstly, clutching your chest at the surprise when you hear title of the talk, then grabbing hold of the seat like you are on a nose-diving airplane for its duration. Going uncontrollably red with in the face was another signal. Thank goodness the brother stuck to some dreary scriptures to make his point rather than outlining obvious visible manifestations. (Along the lines of: "apostates often go bright red in the congregation when these matters are discussedfrom the platform, or suddenly need the toilet") Otherwise I would surely have been rumbled.
Any other apostates out there caught out by tonight's talk? Think it was a deliberate ploy to flush us out?
So please, for the sake of my poor old heart, do give us a warning next time.