Another example of JW Kindness

by AMarie 19 Replies latest jw friends

  • Esmeralda

    What is it with this this week? Happening all over!

    I'm so sorry that you went through that. No one should have to :(

    I've been going through something similiar with my older sister, rabid JW. She was happy that my (worldly") husband and I were the only other members of the family to shoulder any responsibility when Dad was ill, even caring for him at our house because her elder husband made certain we all knew that he wouldn't be happy if Dad went there. (was fine with me, I wanted Dad here!)

    So while Dad's here, he promises my daughter that "as soon as he's better" he'll take her on a trip to Florida. Then what does he do? He gets on a plane and goes down there for a week with my sister: no one else invited! I had to jump through hoops to keep it from my little one, she'd be devestated if she knew they went without her.

    To top it off, she used airline vouchers that I had given her to get their tickets. *slap*

    Then last night my ex went off on my mom for talking to me, reminding her three times of my STATUS because he was ticked that I told him I didn't want him dragging our daughter to that special meeting on Sunday, in light of the fact they're having armed guards. There is no reason for a five year old to go to that. He tore up one side of my mom and down the other because she told me about the guards.

    Grrrr. Gets me so riled. I feel like I just got to a good patch emotionally, you know, taking my site down and all and then after a few peaceful days, this damned JW crap comes back and lands on me again!

    I wish we could move.

    Joel, PLEASE tell me that you don't send presents to those people. Don't let them walk on you that way!

    *hugs* all around

  • circe


    That sucks! I agree with Billygoat: I would gently ask why it was ok for her to fellowship with you when she needed your help. The hypocrisy boggles my mind.


    I'm torn between telling you "Don't you dare send presents!" and "Send gifts Joelbear, show them who the better person is!"


    I lived in Port Orchard for a couple of months back in 1993. I loved taking the ferry to Seattle to go to the market (Pike Street?) Tell the Sound hello for me!


    Move here! Move here!


  • dedalus

    I'm tempted to echo Cicre's cry to Esmerelda: "Move here! Move here!" But, Foxy and I move just about every year, so perhaps someday we'll find ourselves in her neck of the woods anyway.

    AMarie: I'm really sorry to read about your situation, and I know how infuriating it is, to call up a sibling with whom you think everything is AOK, only to discover that person has, without telling you, jettisoned you from his or her life.

    My current situation is: I'm about to become a father for the first time, and my father won't have anything to do with me or his future granddaughter, simply because my fiancee and I aren't yet married. Never mind that part of the reason we postponed our wedding is because some JW relatives said they wouldn't attend, so we thought we'd give them time to "cool off." (Hey, if we're gonna have a wedding, we deserve to have a good one, with all the people we care for in attendance!)

    Anyway, I can understand my father being disappointed in me -- as Farkel said once, parents are inevitably disappointed in choices their kids make -- but his (my father's) disavowal of his unborn granddaughter really shocks me.

    What to do? I don't know. Witnesses, in my experience, are the most stubborn people in the world, for the stupidest reasons. It wouldn't matter if they saw the members of the governing body throwing small babies from the top of the Bethel building -- if they discovered lewd photos of their elders -- if they learned that every teaching delivered through the Watchtower is pagan in origin. So, the best you can do is live your life ("live your best life," as Esmerelda's Dr. Phil & Oprah might say ). Or, and someone else said, "The best revenge is living well."

    Hang in there, and keep posting, if you find it helps you.


  • FrightMare

    I think I know the solution Amarie. Get reinstated!

  • SixofNine

    AMarie, so sorry for your pain. I think blondie no doubt pegged it with "You can chalk this up to September 11 and a guilty conscience. She was willing to "disobey God" when she thought the "end" was far away."

    Witnesses are so incredibly "spiritually materialistic" it hurts to be in the same world with them.

  • sf

    "You can chalk this up to September 11 and a guilty conscience. She was willing to "disobey God" when she thought the "end" was far away."

    You nailed it!

    You'd think after this terrorism on the U.S. that conditions on love would cease and "goodwill" (as Teddy puts it) would prevail with theattitude of "even though"... I STILL love You because you were born to me". It isn't gonna happen Es. But is a nice dream.


    sKally, Resigned and Resolved over tryin to save her mother, klass(a freedom that is very painful...if that makes sense; freedom isn't suppose to cause pain)

  • LDH

    I am so sorry AMarie.

    Why don't you try to feel pity for her instead of anger? I know this would be hard for me, but you have to realize she is being mentally manipulated!

    You may also try quoting from the Sicksiety's website in which they say something like, "Dfing does NOT sever family ties." [8>]

    I think it's at

    I would not focus on the $700. You spent it because you wanted to help her, period. It's like giving me a gift and then being mad cause I don't display it where you want me to.


  • Esmeralda
    You may also try quoting from the Sicksiety's website in which they say something like, "Dfing does NOT sever family ties."

    Oh yeah! I'm gonna print that and then shove it so far up my ex's...well you know, if he ever pulls that "you shouldn't have dealings with your df'd daughter" thing on my mom again. He not only wanted to keep my family after the divorce (and succeeded to a large extent) he isn't happy unless he has them and I don't

    What a sicko.

    Meanwhile, awwwww circe and Dedalus you're so sweet. It's so nice to be wanted! *lol* :)

    love ya

  • JeffT

    I also live in the Seattle area.

    Amarie: If I can help give me a holler.

    Dim: Ditto above when you move. I'm an accountant for a Real Estate syndicator, if you need help with finding a place I'd be happy to offer advice (I have no financial interest in this).

    My email is [email protected]

  • AMarie

    Thank you all for your replies.

    Frightmare: I really hope you are joking about the reinstatement comment. That aint happenin! lol

    I kindly confronted my sister last night about why she asked for me help and then blew me off. She said that now that she is married she wants to live a make changes in her life to become a better person in God's eyes, which I guess I can understand. LDH, you are right about pittying her for the mental manipulation she is dealing with. I know that when I was JW, I was exactly the same if not worse. I really don't want to let what she does affect me the way it is. I'm just going to let it go and get on with my life.

    The only thing that gets me is that I really don't think this is a September 11 thing. For the past two or three months, she and my other sister have called each other everyday, while I never go one phone call. I really think she had this one planned. But OH Well, Like Blondie said "No good deed goes Unpunished". I might as well let it go instead of letting it eat me up.

    Mulan & JeffT: I'm not exactly sure which part of Seattle/Congregation they live in. I never found out which congregation she decided to join. Thank you there much for your offer to help though. You have no idea how much I appreciate it.

    I must go now. It's 4:00 and time to leave work. Thank you all so much for your kind words. You have made me feel alot better. I'll keep you all posted on what happens next.



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