Elders in denial?

by Bobhere 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • zack
    zack

    I wasn't in denial as much as I was in suppression. The total collaps of a belief system is not something many people deal

    with easily. Sooner or later, as mentioned in this thread, a person experiences something PERSONAL that allows the mind

    to open just enough for the scales to drop from their eyes. A JW will sooner or later experience the lack of any true love and

    concern. It is a religion built upon SURVIVAL. It is Darwinian, not Christian.

  • rolling rock
    rolling rock

    Hello Bobhere... If you gave an elder a copy of CoC, I would say to give him some time to really stop and think about what the book had to say. It could take weeks or years. But sooner or later it going to have some kind of effect.

  • jeanV
    jeanV

    I wish someone had given me a copy. I do not know how I would have reacted (I have always been open minded), it likely depends on who and how. Maybe I would have taken the standard reaction after many years of mind control.

    But I agree with rolling rock, sooner or later it makes an effect. Once while visiting a DF, he mentioned something about the cross. It stayed in my mind and eventually lead me to make some research that lead to other discoveries. You just need to get the ball rolling.

  • Bobhere
    Bobhere
    Was an Elder once said People are treated like meat and disfellowshiped without any heart involved

    That was my experience My 14 year old daughter was raped did not tell us went to the doctor when she realized she was pregnant and then made arrangements with the help of one of her friends for an abortion. My wife and I found out about this the night before the appointment with the abortion clinic. She was trying to borrow money from a neighbour for it. I reasoned with her I remember her words Dad I can't have this baby. I felt for her A woman is raped she feels dirty tries to wash away the feelings and here was a potential permanent reminder of her humiliation growing inside her.My wife son and I went with her to the clinic. My wife who had been at odds with ( the usual teenage parent squables) her daughter was now fully supportive knowing full well what she was to go through having had two abortions herself before becoming a witness. As a family we had never been so close. Then the committee meeting. 4 Elders baying for blood could not have given a dam what my family and I had gone through. There actions in DF me and giving my wife public reproof drove a wedge between us.

    PS You have my respect Was an Elder once

  • Crumpet
    Crumpet

    Bobhere - that is truly a terrible experience - both for your daughter and yourselves. And to be punished for supporting her. You did the right thing. How are your family holding up now? Does your wife or yourself want to be reinstated? How is your daughter getting over it all - she must feel terribly guilty amongst everything else for the way the elders have treated you and your son must be suffering to

    I feel for you all !

  • avidbiblereader
    avidbiblereader

    Bob, first welcome and secondly I am sorry about your story with your family. It amazes me with the lack of fellow feeling and love that goes on in JC, with good reason Christ said not to judge another, how can any of us know what you and your family was and possibly still is feeling to this day.

    I too was an elder and I think several hit the nail on the head, depending on how far you are in your faith you will run but sooner or later something will happen and it is then that you start to question your faith. Just like the seed illustration that Jesus gave, it is there, just hasn't sprouted yet but give it time. Intelligence has nothing to do with the heart, as a matter of fact Jesus and Paul both said that intelligence is not a quality that God cares about when it comes to his faithful and real children, it is the heart that matters.

    abr

  • Gill
    Gill

    Welcome Bobhere!

    Sorry to read what happened to your daughter and family!

    For what it's worth, I'm truly impressed with how you supported your daughter, your whole family together. That is really something.

    Your 'punishment' from the WTBTs is nonsense, and I'm so sorry that this has driven a wedge as you put it, between you and your wife. I hope things may improve for you.

    Rolling Rock - I think you are right in that sooner or later, the information given to a JW will have an effect. I remember people on the doors that said things to me that made me think....not at that time, day, week, month or year....but it did get through eventually. I never forget them and what they said.

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