by FadeToBlack 15 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Oubliette

    FTB, I think you'll accomplish more with your wife if you calmly and rationally sit down and discuss together why you do not want to contribute to the WTBTS.

    Explain your reasons and be sure to state to your wife that, as a couple you understand that she has a right to participate in this decision.

    If you just make a unilateral decision it will almost certainly not get you what you want. You may keep a few dollars or złotys or whatever it is where you live out of the hands of the WTBTS, but you may lose your wife in the process.


  • FadeToBlack

    Wise words Oubliette, but I'm starting to feel like I've already lost her. To be honest, it seems like we are just 2 people that happen to live under the same roof. I think the only thing we have in common at the moment is our love for our dogs. I think she is still willing to make a go of it (with the hope that I come back to 'the truth'). but I'm just feeling angry.

    I know that I need to 'get it together' for the both of us, but I'm just not feeling the love. Her comments on the side, seem to imply that she also is feeling stuck in a place she'd rather not be. I guess we are going to have to have that grown-up conversation sooner or later.

    Thanks (honestly)...

  • OneEyedJoe

    FTB -

    That's pretty rough. Sorry to hear it's gone that way for you. It's probably a small consolation, but it's not your fault. It's actually quite commendable that you're continuing to stick it out, but make sure to take care of yourself too.

  • Oubliette

    FTB, I've been in your situation. I know how tough it is.

    I tried for years to get my wife to sit down and talk openly and honestly about my concerns about our religion. She wouldn't do it.

    One time I raised a particularly difficult issue (mind you I was an elder for over 20 years), she walked away from me with her hands over her ears shouting, "I'm not listening to any of this!"

    In retrospect, I realize now that that moment was the end for our marriage. We continued to live together for another 6 or 7 years, but we were essentially little more than roommates; although we did continue to "keep up appearances" while at the meetings.

    Eventually I left her. I do regret that I couldn't figure out a way to reach her and get her to wake up, but I would still do it all over again. The only things I'd do differently would be to resign as an elder without any explanation to my fellow elders, quit going to all meetings and then I'd have separated and eventually filed for divorce.

    Your own individual integrity is just too important to live a fake life pretending to be someone you're not for the sake of people that would drop you in a second if they really knew how you felt and what you believed.

    Hang in there, make an exit strategy and keep moving forward!

    I wish you all the best,


  • wannabefree
    FadeToBlack ... my comment was of course on the extreme side while my thoughts were more in line with what Oubliette said. I'm in a similar situation with my wife. I feel for you cuz it really sucks. Best wishes to you on that grown up conversation. I had one with my wife in December hoping it would snap her somewhat into reality but so far no results to speak of. I know longer fit into her everlasting plans, and as a JW I understand that, but why she is willing to throw away 30 years without even thinking about it pisses me off.
  • WTWizard

    First, this is what happens when you marry without being able to test each other out. The washtowel claims fornication ruins lives. That you didn't do "fornication" before marrying allowed this incompatibility to go undetected until it was too late.

    You, as the sole wage earner, should have a say on how the money is spent. Otherwise, your wife will simply go along with the houndings that all money should be thrown away. They are going to ramp up the requirements that you donate ever more, and your wife will simply take more and more to donate to this damnation work. One rule is no donating to anything that gives negative value. Where is this money really going? And it is worse than merely protecting pedophiles and silencing the victims. This money goes right into black magic against the whole human race. It goes toward spreading damnation books worldwide. It goes into planning Israel missions where the objective is to allow that nation to rule America while giving rabbis something to use on a black magic working against us all. It goes into poverty workings against the population--and that includes especially those in attendance. Is this negative value to you? To your wife? If so, it is forbidden.

    Animal shelters, on the other hand, are good. So long as the money is really used to help animals, you are wise to continue allowing donations to such. In fact, you could be unknowingly helping release us from slavery by having those who abuse animals (usually putting negative energy into humanity in doing so) put where they belong (in jail) and the animals released from suffering (cutting off this negative energy). Without this negative energy, they are that much less able to use it to enslave us all. And, at the very least, the animals will be better off. Just don't let the washtowel know that Satan and His Demons are very much against animal cruelty, and you will be doing them a big favor by helping out against it.

    And, if your wife still wants to serve joke-hova after realizing that its main adversary is against animal cruelty, she might be beyond salvation.

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