What a Birthday thus far, found my molestors mother today

by Apostate Kate 19 Replies latest jw friends

  • Abandoned
    Abandoned

    Wow Apostate Kate, I don't know what to say. I'm glad that you are able to be so loving to someone who was so mean to you. I'm not able to do that to the prick at work who was harrassing me.

    I'm glad you are enjoying yourself helping the elderly. That is one of the most satisfying things to do.

    About your birthday....

    Here's a little poem, just for you....

    Kate
    If kindness were a person
    If love walked on two legs
    If honesty and sincerity
    Were common as ham and eggs
    If everywhere on earth we looked
    Everything we saw was great
    I'm sure that rising 'bove it all
    Would be my friend named Kate.

    Have a happy one my friend.

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    I went to the first facility and had a great time with the Seniors. I just love them. Then went to the new facility.

    You are a wonderful person to love and show attention to those who are forgotton by many-even their families. I hope you feel good about yourself and your accomplishments. I hope the woman's family appreciates what you are doing. If they are witnesses they may not.

  • Apostate Kate
    Apostate Kate
    Have a happy one my friend.

    What a beautiful poem, thank you Thomas, thank you for the birthday wishes. We do share something special in our love for these precious lonely souls. {{{{hugs}}}} I read your words frequently as do many others. I have passed out about 40 handbooks so far. Thanks again for your help.

    I was adopted as a daughter yesterday by this one special lady who likes to be called the hat lady. She wants me to be her daughter, what an honor! She holds on to her dignity by coorinating her wardrobe with a big matching hat everyday. But Thomas she seems to be going downhill so fast, it breaks my heart.

    One thing I have learned about the ministry is the employees will want to use you to help them take care of menial things. I have to keep gently reminding them I am not there to help them do their jobs, but there to give love and attention to the residents.

    After sleeping on this I realize that due to the strict confidentiality rules of the facility and written into the ministry handbook I can't tell the family she is there. My sister bore the only grandchildren she has. I'm going to explain it to the Social Worker this morning and get her approval before I make the calls.

    Sorry what happened to you at work. That can cause one to feel so horrid, and being a man had to make it even worse. They should have treated you with much more respect than they did. It would not be normal if you weren't angry over that situation. The things that happened to me happened many years ago and I've had time to heal. I only hope that the people that hurt me at some point in their lives are sorry for it. Not for my sake but for theirs. It is not easy admitting hurting others but in my faith I believe it is imperitive to the human spirit to do so.

    Quandry, thank you also. Her family, well basically it is the one JW daughter in law that will be very upset to learn of this. She seems to take great pleasure in lording herself over this person and her sons that she is not disfellowshipped like they are. She has been in control of her for years, keeping her away from us, her 3 grandchildren and 7 great grandchildren. But I believe they are out of State. I was told her only visitor is the 1 JW sister (biological) who also will not be too happy about this.

    I seen the sister at my nieces wedding where my husband performed the ceremony. It was quite a ceremony. She and her daughter who may also have been disfellowshipped (mom may know poster "yucca" is my mama) were at the wedding. Everyone loved the ceremony, loved my husband, but the only people who shunned us was that 1 sister and her daughter.

    Morally and ethically it is a no brainer. There is nothing right about a disfellowshipped JW living the end of her life with an occasional visit from 1 JW sister, when she has about 10 other people who would love to come see her and laugh about the good ol days. We actually had some fun back then despite the cult. Of course fun was frowned on so we were mostly all on the fringe except the one sister. She has always seemed to be flawless.

    We used to live in the same apartment building on the beach in Southern California in the early 1970's. It was so fun. She and her husband were such a hoot! They were perfectly eccentric ..lol..

    I just hope the Social Worker gives me the ok to tell the family. I can't risk the ministry coming under JW attack, that would hurt too many people. I also will not go see her, if we run into each other that is one thing but she is not in our program officially so I have to be very careful.

  • Abandoned
    Abandoned
    But Thomas she seems to be going downhill so fast, it breaks my heart.

    I know, Kate, I've been there so many times before. Just remember their spunk or smile or whatever and hold them dear in your heart.

    I'm going to explain it to the Social Worker this morning and get her approval before I make the calls.

    I think that's a wise plan. Don't jeopardize what you love so much.

    Sorry what happened to you at work. That can cause one to feel so horrid, and being a man had to make it even worse.

    But I'm standing up for myself. More than I ever have before and while some don't like it, they are having to handle this carefully as I'll file an official complaint so fast if I'm ever forced to work with again, take orders from him, or the like. The thing that makes me the most upset though, is this guy is still spewing garbage about me. I work with many other people and I don't have any problem with them but many have a problem with him. Why can't they see that he's the one that's causing this and not me? I don't know, but I'm standing up for myself and it feels good.

    Take care my friend. Oh, I'm glad you liked the poem. It was brand new and just for you...

  • Lady Liberty
    Lady Liberty

    Dear Aposta Kate,

    WOW!! What a day! What a horrible thing to have gone through!! I am so sorry!!!! As for today..you never know what may come out of this whole thing. TIme will tell. I am sure it will prove to be VERY interesting! It must be hard..but I do believe things happen for a reason. If you are getting the feeling it was divinely directed, then it probably was!

    NOW, on to happier subjects.... "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!! "

    Heres some "Birthday" wine!! CHEERS!!

    Sincerely,

    Lady Liberty

  • Apostate Kate
    Apostate Kate

    Thank you again Thomas!

    Thank you Lady Liberty. I did have that glass of funky olollieberry wine whatever that is! It was good. A rare treat.

    I went to the second facility again yesterday to take our Senior her goodies. That is an alzhiemers dementia home. It is very different. My Senior looked more depressed than I've ever seen her before. She is only there because we had a bizaar cold spell and water pipes all over broke. The ceiling in her room fell down and she lost most of her clothes. They just needed a place to put her.

    She says she is happier there because they are helping her get up and walk, but it sure is different. One resident asked me to help her. I told her I was sorry but I am not allowed to help I am just a visitor. (She was ok and the nurse was right there) She then said "DID I ASK YOU!!!!!" lol...there is much more moaning, crying, wandering. This is a whole different program. I'm so glad you wrote what you did Thomas because it really prepped me for this new facility. I'll admit it is a little intimidating at first.

    Met the Social Worker yesterday but she said she has not had time to call the JW's legal guardian, I have heard nothing yet today. I'm going to wait until she asks me again to please come see her, as she did on the 31st. If I accidently run into her I'll tell her then that I will need written permission from her JW sister or legal guardian if the sister is not. I can see where this may be heading.

    The JW was sharp as a tack! She is lonely and is going to want the company. The reason she is there is because she will run off and it is a locked facility. She is going to have to get over her hatred of apostates, to get what she wants.

    Thanks again for the support guys.

  • Abandoned
    Abandoned
    I'm so glad you wrote what you did Thomas because it really prepped me for this new facility. I'll admit it is a little intimidating at first.

    It's not for everyone and it has its downside, but focus on the people and how much they need help. Even those who can't show it, or won't, appreciate having someone around.

    One of my favorite ladies was sitting right next to a hundred years old and tiny as an evening visit. She'd hardly eat but I loved her so much. Everyday I'd come up to her and she'd gently touch her forehead to mine and then smile. I miss her, but I made her day before she passed away too.

  • Apostate Kate
    Apostate Kate

    Awe I am sure you did make her day. There is a lady 103 years old in my adopted Seniors room. It is really hard to face. Today I'm going to try to connect with her. She can't talk. Met a really cool lady 90 at another facility yesterday. She is a hoot! She is African American and was telling me stories told to her about slavery and her family's land. I am thinking I should tape record some of the stories. I do have a very cheap one, may have to invest in a higher quality.

    I had an interesting conversation with a social worker yesterday, not the one from the facility where the JW is. She said that if there were complaints against me for being apostate that there was nothing anyone could do. She said they could not keep me from visiting anyone I wanted to at anytime.

    It also opened the door to tell her some truths about JWs. She was surprised at some of the things I said but believed me because of what she see's happening over and over.

    She told me that the JW's leave all thier belongings, money, estates to the WT when they die. I told her that according to today's psychological standards of what a cult is, they are definatly a cult. So this is good actually, an allie that understands. She also said that since I was a relative of the dub I can tell whatever I want to the family. I also told her that with all the money the WT gets from estates the only money they spend on followers is millions in legal fee's fighting for the right to allow babies and children to die for lack of blood. She thought they had charities like nursing homes. I said I know that they do have some but I can assure you they are for profit and would never take someone with no income.

    I'm going to the one today where the JW is. I have 3 facilities now. Yesterday I played balloon ping pong with them, made room visits, and made plans on taking my ancient aussie dog in for visits. I have to buy him a red wagon since he is too old to walk that far. I think they will love him. It will make Speedy dog feel like he still has a job even though he is too tired to run the ranch anymore.

    Kate the evil apostate

  • Apostate Kate
    Apostate Kate

    Well she made her choice. The shunning has begun. Right after lunch she jumped up and left after giving me stink eye.

    Was sad. I took my Senior out for a beautiful conversation and a smoke. The JW relative was still waiting an hour later to be taken out for hers when she could have come with us. Maybe she will change her mind someday, but I doubt it. What a shame to have a mind locked up like that by the WT.

    Hey Thomas!!!!! I will be meeting with the largest local charitable organisation's director on Monday, who knows where this will head! We have common goals to make sure no Seniors fall through the cracks, those at home too. I'm hoping we merge, it will be easier to get volunteers. There are 20 local churches supporting this organization. I now have weekly meetings and bi monthly training meetings set up.

  • JWdaughter
    JWdaughter

    Happy Birthday! Did you ask this lady if she would like you to send her grandkids her way? Wouldn't that be her decision? I am sorry, I don't know the circumstances, but she didn't sound incompetetent, and sounded as if she wanted to know her grandkids. . .oops, just read the posts that came later. Hope all goes well, even little old DF'd grammas deserve to have a visit from their grandkids! :) Probably need it more than most!

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