Nosferatu's School of Dating - Lesson 2.2 - Building Rapport

by Nosferatu 26 Replies latest social relationships

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu

    Since many have commented that lesson 2.1 has "no feeling", portrays the individual as an abuser, and all the other negative comments, I decided to cover rapport next.

    The unfortunate thing is I can only give you tips on how to build good rapport. I will not be giving you magic lines that will make her fall in love with you. It's your own personality, your enthusiasm, your wit, your sense of humor, your creativeness, and your imagination that has to do the actual work.

    Many people will tell you "forget about all these tips, tricks and techniques. Just be yourself." However, if being yourself isn't working, you need to do something different. You need to be your BEST self by amplifying your BEST qualities. When I mean BEST qualities, I don't mean what is socially defined. Manners, money, and attire aren't your best qualities. Those are just add-ons. I'm talking about all the things I mentioned above: enthusiasm, wit, humor, creativeness, and imagination. You must AMPLIFY these personality traits if you're going to develope good rapport with a woman. You must also be comfortable interacting, both verbally and physically with the woman in order for her to be comfortable around you.

    One of the best ways to get a woman to quickly become comfortable around you is to treat her like you've known her for years, or even like your bratty little sister. It's this level of comfort that you're aiming for, and you need to start developing it within the first few minutes of meeting her. The best thing is, she doesn't need to know a damn thing about you to be comfortable around you!

    In the beginning, when you get onto a topic of conversation with a woman, be enthusiastic about your topic. Use enthusiasm as if your opinion is the most important thing in the world (minus the arrogance of it actually being more important than everything else). Also, be positive about your opinion! Women like men who are passionate and positive about the things they care about.

    Kino is also extremely important in the woman being comfortable around you. A woman cannot be comfortable around a person who is afraid to touch her! Pat her on the shoulder when she says something funny. Give her a shoulder hug when she's accomplished something and say "right on!" When she's jokingly offended at something you've said or done (note: fishing for some positive attention), smile, pat her on the head like a dog and say "Awww, pooor (her name)". For you women who have just been offended by this, remember that we're in a POSITIVE and FUN atmosphere. Remember kino is non-sexual touch. Bat her earrings around a bit like a cat, poke her in the arm for fun, shake her hand and say "congratulations!" when she tells you how good / nice something turned out. Basically, any kind of non-sexual touch.

    Speaking of fun, this is one of the most important things that you need to do when you're interacting with this woman. If you're not having fun, neither is she. If you're treating the interaction like a job interview, she's going to be uncomfortable and bored. You want her to feel as comfortable around you as possible, so when she asks how old you are, tell her something like "I'm 138 going on 21. And I'm guessing you're 132 going on 19". Try to have some fun with every serious question she asks you. If she asks you what your job is, tell her that you're a lingerie model or you're a part time mannequin at Sears. Basically, anything interesting, funny, or unusual that you can think of. The more unusual and the more casual you tell is (as if it's you're real job), the more effective.

    Sex

    Humorous sexual comments are GOLD for making conversation more interesting, humorous, and fun. Discussing sexual topics also brings a level of comfort between you and the woman.

    The best way to introduce the topic of sex: When she answers that she likes something (such as horror movies, her shoes, dancing, sewing) ask her (playfully with a smile) if it turns her on. She'll usually play right along and respond in the affirmative. Even if it's not affirmative, you can push it a little farther: "Well, MY shoes definately turn me on!" You've just opened the door for more sexual references in your conversation (but don't make your whole conversation about sex!) You can also let her know that mundane things (like certain colors or goofy sounds) make you horny. REMEMBER this is all in a playful atmosphere, and sexual humor makes conversation interesting and fun.

    The quicker you make her feel comfortable around you, the quicker you're going to get your first kiss from her (possibly during or by the end of the first night you interact with her), and the better your chances of landing a first date with her.

    You may use any or all of the examples above that I've used, but to become a TRULY interesting guy with a winning personality, you need to use your own talent, your humor, your wit, and your own ideas to make these situations work for you. The only REAL way to practice all of this is to put yourself out in the real world and try it out. Yes, you will screw up, but there's lots of women out there to practice on.

    I'm going to put out a suggestion: Go out and get yourself a part time job to practice interacting with people you don't know. Get a part-time job with a large turnover rate (fast food restaraunts are great for this). Practice getting new people, male and female, to feel comfortable around you in a short amount of time. The practice will genuinely pay off.

    I honestly can't stress this enough, you NEED to go out and put the knowledge to work in order to get good with women and reap the benefits. Reading this stuff and memorizing it will do no good if you don't use it.

    And for all the women who are telling me that this stuff doesn't work don't seem to believe that it's all been tried and tested. Trust me, I wouldn't defend any of this stuff if I didn't believe in it. If I didn't believe in it, I might as well be defending the Watchtower Society too.

    Make way for the number close and the first phone call!

  • james_woods
    james_woods

    Nosferatu, did you (by any chance) learn about real estate by ordering tapes from Carleton Sheets?

    I do not understand why you are going on and on with this stuff here.

    Maybe you should explain that first, before such nuggets as "sexual humor is worth it's weight in gold"...

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu
    Nosferatu, did you (by any chance) learn about real estate by ordering tapes from Carleton Sheets?

    I know nothing about real estate, and I've never done any learning from "lessons on cassette" including Ross Jeffries' Speed Seduction.

    I do not understand why you are going on and on with this stuff here.

    Before I started posting this stuff, I asked if I should post it. The overall response was "Yes" and so here it is.

    Also, new former JWs have absolutely no clue on how to socially interact with people, let alone women. Being successful with the opposite sex withouth the convenience of the built in social circle and "security" of the JWs is one hell of a challenge, and it's quite intimidating. I was horribly clueless as to how to approach a woman, ask her for a date, and how to behave in the bedroom.

    I see so much confusion on here when it comes to the opposite sex in general, and I almost feel like I'm the only one who knows what's going on.

    I honestly hope that I help at least one person on here get this part of their lives working. But I also know that many won't read, nor will they go out and try this stuff out. But at least I put the information out there, and it's free.

    There has also been recent interest with it since the book "The Game" by Neil Strauss came out. I've been using this stuff long before the book was released and have a pretty good grip on what works, and can dive deeper into how it works.

  • james_woods
    james_woods
    I see so much confusion on here when it comes to the opposite sex in general, and I almost feel like I'm the only one who knows what's going on.

    Well, that pretty well clears it up for me, at least.

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    Nos:

    I see so much confusion on here when it comes to the opposite sex in general, and I almost feel like I'm the only one who knows what's going on.

    That would be one opinion

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu

    I love you guys. I'd have your baby if I wasn't male

  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    hey come on speed it up - I want to kbnow when you are going to do the chapter on getting her between the sheets

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu

    Don't worry, we'll get to sex before we get to the meaningful, long term relationship.

  • Xena
    Xena

    Some of the stuff you post is good advise, some of it is IMO crap but what you really don't seem to get is that not all women are alike. If these guys want to get the same type of woman you do then the cookie cutter approach might work for them but if they are attracted to a different type it might just have the opposite effect.

    And for all the women who are telling me that this stuff doesn't work don't seem to believe that it's all been tried and tested.

    Stats please. Cause trust me the same stuff you are spouting has been tested on THIS woman and didn't work. Some women do actually like the nice guys.

    For the record I'm not trying to be negative just to be negative but to let guys know that not all women like this type of thing and to give some input as to what might or might not work on different women. Just for reference.

    I don't recall which thread it was on but you made an excellent point and I've seen you make it again somewhere, that it's a numbers thing. That is something guys really need to remember, and women as well. It's the old adage, you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince/princess/fuck buddy.

  • blondie
    blondie

    Welcome back, Xena.

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