We are forgetting something.

by MrMoe 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • MrMoe
    MrMoe

    Those of us who are no longer JW's were JW's at one point in time, correct?

    We all KNOW for a FACT that 95% of JW's do care - so much - that they endure mosquitoes, heat, cold, fire ants, rabid dogs, loss of personal income, spend their free time dedicated to helping others, and much much more to help assholes who hate them to help save their lives.

    Please - do not carry anger towards these people, because we were once like them (blind.) It is not their fault they are wrong - because at one point in time we were ALL like them. Maybe they just haven’t had the chance to run into the same things we have - or maybe they are very co-dependant - or maybe they are happy and feel they are doing what is right - or maybe it's just not their time yet - or maybe they do know but they are scared.

    I love Jehovah's Witnesses - because if it wasn't for them I wouldn't be who I am today. I know the GB prints a lot of crap - but it is NOT for me to judge. Most JW's are some of the most loving people who truly do care. Those that are angry and rude are simply frustrated with their own lives - because as you can remember - they are in a cult. They are brainwashed. Just like you and I were brainwashed, too.

    We are forgetting something… You can catch more flys with honey…

  • Naeblis
    Naeblis

    Stop....you're making me hungry.
    But you're right. A lot of times we forget that they are reacting in exactly the same way we might of a few years back. A little bit of patience goes a long way, especially when WE, as "apostates" do not react to them the way the Society tells them we will. I think tomorrow I'll buy all my cousins ice cream. That'll show those fuckers@!! :)

  • MrMoe
    MrMoe

    Was that a dash of seriousness I saw in your humor?

  • Naeblis
    Naeblis

    Keep it quiet. I think that's the first witness related post I've made here :P

  • MrMoe
    MrMoe

    MK

  • ashitaka
    ashitaka

    moe,

    I already talked to you on another thread, and here's another view.

    Perhaps we're just still in that beaten-dog defensive mode. I know I am. I have never struck another person, and rarely get into fights-it's just not my nature. But, I do harbor so much resentment towards the control people are under and represent. It's hard to get past the immediate and be cool with the people who have chastised and badgered you in the past.

    I mean, the seven or eight congregations in my area present me with daily reminders of my "sin" which is no sin at all. I'm a married man living a chaste life, free of abuse or neglect. But the looks, chastisment and anger towards my decisions have made me angry towards all of them. And the mindset is the "all are goats" mindset. I don't know enough about you to surmise, but if you were an active witness for a few years, then you know what place everyone played in your life. Your brothers were the everything and all. They were your only-and they all said the same things about the "goats" at the doors.

    Just the thought of people coming to MY DOOR and judging me is irritating, and it reminds me of every bad time I had with them.

    But, you're right, like I said in the other thread. I just wanted to say what I think other people think-perhaps.

    I know I feel a bit lost.

    Ashitaka

    "I pray that I may never see the desert again-hear me God."-Robert Bolt

  • MegaDude
    MegaDude

    Moe,

    A man I know who was never a Witness, and whose wife became a Witness
    came to the same conclusion you did after years and years. He told me, laughing, "Kill the JWs with kindness and love. It drives them absolutely crazy."

    The elitist mentality of the JWs really makes them believe foolishness like they can be the only happy people, or the only real spiritual people, or the only truly loving people. When you demonstrate to JWs by your actions and behavior you have already have a life that has surpassed them in happiness, love and spirituality, you are giving them the greatest anti-Watchtower sermon ever

    "Hope is a good thing... maybe the best of things."
    Andy's letter to Red in the Shawshank Redemption

    "If it's worth feeling bad about, it's worthy of amnesia."
    Richard Bandler, radical NLP therapist

  • MrMoe
    MrMoe

    Well said Mega. If we act with what they dub as worldly behavior, we prove them right. It is so important to treat them with respect because we were once just like them. And besides - all good people deserve respect and JW's are generally good people.

  • ashitaka
    ashitaka

    Moe,

    i take execption to the statement that JW's are generally a good people. As persons themselves? Certainly. But AS Jw's? No. As JW's their whole demeanor changes. I've seen friends drink till they pass out (to be future Ministerial Servents) at age 15 (while counseling me about my "attitude", and a friend who a week before had become a Min. Serve. had messed around with my sister the weekend of his announcement. Of course, his dad and brother covered it up and it became a "family issue."

    I guess it's the "dont ask dont tell" policy that affects all execpt those of privilidge. Now i don't believe that people should be eternally punished for being weak. We all have our vices, but I can't take the double -standard.

    Witness had their golden time, about 1945 to the mid sixties. They were a good congregation, and generally were a good people. But they are nearing the end of the curve, and the double-standard has become the rule. And this makes them bad, at least in the sense that they are bad when working under the direction of the GB.

    They want to love God and people, but number crunchers have put quantity in front of quality. It's not even a question of doctrine, although that is a whole issue in itself. Many churches have bizzarre doctrine.

    But it's the people you worship with that makes the atmosphere of love in the congregation. If there is derision, division, hate, and shunning, love will be buried, and the congregation as a spiritual whole dies.

    I hope they all just see what's happening and don't lose faith. I don't want to see family and friends go through the heartbreak of having their faith shattered. It happened to me, and it's not pleasant. of course, i'd prefer if they left the JW's of their own accord and happily so, but I dont think it's going to happen. People will leave shattered and careworn, and they will feel like they have no place to go. They will be even more trapped then they are now, because they'll see their broken faith as the ultimate sin-sinning against the spirit.

    I have yet seriously to pray to God since I left,and it's been two years. And it's because of the collective guilt that's been thrust upon my wife and I by family and friends, and we're not even df'd. Just marked, as I'm told. they made sure the word got around that we're not wanted unless we have some serious groveling to do.

    Moe, individuals make the whole of the witnesses. And if the whole is rotten, I don't see how, even generally, the witnesses can be good people. I still love them, but I don't like them, because they feel proud when shunning, gossip with derision about people they use to call brother, and pity those who are not to be pitied.

    People say there are no bad people, just bad emotions and deeds.

    The body is a cask filled with these things. Empty of emotion and deed, it is dead. If it is filled with bad or unkind things, then the whole is unkind. If people think bad things, they are bad.

    You're right, they're not all bad, but I had known thousands of witness in my time there, and they follow the same pattern, kind or hurt people join, become strong emotionally again, andthen become spiritual bruisers-then some sin down the road takes them down a few steps. Either they become monsters after that or they are shunned-formally or informally. Just a cycle.

    I just read what I wrote-maybe my argument makes the witnesses just a confused people. Good in their hearts, badness in their actions. I don't know, Moe-what do you think?

    "I pray that I may never see the desert again-hear me God."-Robert Bolt

  • MrMoe
    MrMoe

    I disagree with your assumptions that most JW's lead a double life. Sure, there are some that do - mostly youths - but in the congregation where I grew up and surrounding congregations the vast majority were good people and upstanding citizens of the community.

    To label all JW's as living double lives is just as bad as saying all black people commit crimes, all white people hate blacks and all wife beaters ride Harleys and hang out in bars. Stereo types drive me crazy and stereo typing JW's is no different.

    Most JW's have problems and they are all human. Perhaps you witnessed heavy drinking because this was a product of mind control and a way of rebelling. And 99% of the time a JW living a double life gets caught and corrected.

    I am not defending such as actions, but why is a JW misbehaving any different than your next door neighbor misnaming? None. Unfortunately, JW's have to hide when they are a normal human and see a rated R movie. They are a result of the organization and their actions are not always necessarily fault of their own. The puritan attitude is a learned response to a highly controlled environment. Don't be too harsh, we were all there once.

    Do some JW's drink? Yes - and so do non-JW's. Do most JW's have good respectful manners? Yes - and most non-JW's do not - at least where I was from. Been to your local grocery store lately or drive in heavy traffic lately? I guess not. And those JW's who are rude are usually very inactive and are leading a double life - making them about as much as a non-JW as the next guy. When I think JW - I think of the old faithful -serving spotless years in dedication to their beliefs. I know - I was raised by two of them. To deny JW's are good people is crazy. Look at the way they act, the way their homes look, the way they live their lives? To say all witnesses drink heavy is ridiculous.Just about everybody I work with drinks heavily, and non of THEM are JW's.

    I would say the biggest bone I have to pick with JW's is their judgmental attitudes - which again is a learned response to their controlling environment - something that is pounded in them to be. It is only a select few that break away from this vicious cycle and learn to be forgiving. But the JW belief system is not based upon forgiveness. Look at You Know and Fred (fake JW's as it may be) they are prime examples. Judgmental.

    But - you are what you eat - or so the expression goes.

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