It's hard for me to imagine that most people in the US are espousing values taught by Hinduism etc. because they're not aware of them to begin with.
Right. I was bringing up the Hindu/Islam/Jainism positions (and that of many psychologists) to try and demonstrate that the concept of forgiveness has been espoused pretty much universally.
The way to get around those 2 things is to work toward acceptance. Acceptance is what is necessary for our own health, not forgiveness.
That sounds like that might just do the trick. "Accepting" what you can't change or fix is, I guess, also a way of "letting it go." For me, forgiveness (where possible for a person) not only helps someone get past a burdensome conflict, but also empowers them. I suppose the area of concern is that "forgiving" very freely might send a message that what the detractor did was not all that bad after all. It could belittle the terrible thing(s) they've done. I wouldn't blame a person for being concerned about this.