So sorry you're going through this too. My husband is an elder and I've been fading for the last couple of years. I'm completely inactive now.
Just a word about your kids... I woke up to the truth about the WTS just as my kids were entering their teens. JWs aren't supposed to have doubts. Kids who are trying to please their parents won't express their doubts.. maybe not even in their own minds. I told them directly that if they had doubts or questions about something JW related, something they thought didn't make sense, to ask me. (At the time they had no idea how deep my 'apostacy' ran... ) Eventually, they did, and then the floodgates opened. They expressed every doubt they had, I answered as best I could, but NOT using JW reasoning... using common sense and what I had read... ("Some religions believe that... Buddists believe...." etc.)
They have also asked questions of my JW husband, and haven't gotten satisfying answers. But I don't know that they would have been so bold in asking if I hadn't encouraged it, and if they didn't know that they could come to me afterwords and express how 'stupid' and 'retarded' the answers were that they had gotten from their dad.
They have gone to all the meetings and in service, assemblies, etc with their dad. I have told them that they have to do what he says, show him respect, and they have. But they talk to ME. At this point, I have showed them enough about the fallacies of the WTS that they know it's WRONG.. not just another religious option, but WRONG. That is important, too, so that they don't grow up and have a child and then run back to the WTS.
My daughter is at college now, and hasn't attended a meeting since she left home. She's dodging the JWs who are trying to contact her. Success!