Anyone know the answer?

by Woofer 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • Woofer

    I have been d/f for about 10 years now so I don't get to read anymore publications or keep up on any changes. But here is my question and little background.

    I work with a d/f girl and her sister was d/f as well about a month ago. The girls sister and her husband were inactive for 5+ years. The husband cheated on her and the wife was granted a scriptural divorce. During the divorce the wife started to study with a "mature" sister at her hall and also started attending meetings again. A few months later she meets a really nice worldy guy and starts seeing him. At this time she stopped her studies and meeting attendance. Her mother finds out she is sleeping with this guy and turns her into the elders and at that time she gets d/f. The sister (the one I work with) told me that she was only d/f because she started a study and showed interest in coming back to the meetings. She said if she had remained inactive that the elders could not have done anything to her for her relationship with the worldy guy.

    I had always thought that as long as you were baptized and were found to commit wrongdoing that you could be d/f whether you were attending meetings or not. Have the rules changed or was I under the wrong thinking to begin with?

  • AuldSoul


    This is one of those "movable rules" where there is no real standard to go by. An elder body in the same Kingdom Hall could make a radically different decision about the handling of 2 nearly identical cases where the offenders had both been inactive for the same length of time. The "standard" says that the length of time a person has been absent, whether the person has contact with JWs, and whether the community considers them to be one of Jehovah's Witnesses can be taken into consideration in determining if the matter should be acted on by a Unscriptural Judicial Committee of elders.


  • fullofdoubtnow

    They can do it, if they have a mind to. My bf had been inactive for over 5 years, but a couple of elders called to see him about his status as a jw, though he hadn't professed to be one for years, and when he sent them packing they threatened a jc. He did make enemies of these two when he was in the cong, and I suppose they thought they could get revenge, but he da'd anyway.

    If this girl was professing to be a jw, they would have to take action in line with their rules. If she was not, they could have left her to it, but obviously chose no to.

  • mouthy

    I know two people who were D/F for attending another church-they had not gone to a meeting in years...

  • 5go

    I say would that sounds about right but it isn't WT policy. Usualy if you haven't been inactive they leave you alone seeing as no one in the congregation cares about her. (They reserve the right to df you though.) Since she was trying to become active again. Hence had the attention of the congregation on her. The elders no choice but to do something or apear like they condone it. It's wrong but they do it to save face, at her expence.

    In other word it's politic's

  • girasole

    In the congregation that I used to belong to there was a woman who was inactive for over 10 years and not long after she started coming back to meetings (about the time that she was going to rejoin the TMS) she was reproved - this was after she met with the elders to reassess her spiritual condition. From what I understood the thought was that if they did not discipline her then it would set a "bad example" for the rest of the congregation - lest anyone think that they could follow in her footsteps and get away with it.

  • restrangled

    Turning in anyone who is babtized or not is one of the requirements of this so called "religion/cult"

    Some members will ignore behavior of those out for awhile until their conscience is so tortured they must report to relieve their own guilt by association or knowledge of the fact.

    Case in point: Myself. Left at age 18, smoked since I was 28, mom tolerated it until some talk sent her over the edge, reported to the CO and promptly shunned at age 47.

    If you look at the word CONSCIENCE and break it down, ...CON SCIENCE.........kind of interesting!


  • AuldSoul


    So, CON meaning "with" and SCIENCE meaning "knowledge"...not getting your point there, really. Do you mind explaining that? I was with you up until you hit that bump in the road.

    But your experience proves how unequally the standards can be applied. Others have avoided any congregational action after only a year or two of inactivity preceding the discovery of some gross wrongdoing.


  • restrangled

    Dear Auld Soul,

    I was thinking Pro...(for) or Con.....(against) Science.

    For some reason I cannot cut and paste the defination of science, but if you look it up, (science) my post will make sense.

    Sorry I am so inept at the cut/paste thing in this forum.

    Let me know what you think.


  • sf
    I don't get to read anymore publications or keep up on any changes.

    The best thing about this forum, in my opinion, is that THAT is not a problem. And the better thing is, is that blondie makes sure of it!

    Also, if you can try to log into the forum, at least once a week, you will be kept up to date on ALL THINGS WATCHTOWER.

    The problem is time and both physical and emotional energy to actually study WT PUBS without jws. It's an entirely different experience. It is difficult to have to read the deadly, hateful, manipulative terror that this fraud of a religion continues to 'mix and serve' as "fine spiritual food". It's nothing but pure poison to the soul. Yet, I must stay current in order to counter them in the field.

    If you do get a "rainy day" to do some reading, and feel up to it, go into the "doctrines" category and you will find many informative threads on changes and such. In fact, try to check the main categories like blood, child abuse, scandals, doctrines, etc. and you will stay well-armed with info.

    Happy trails!


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