Can't think of a subject for my subject

by purplesofa 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    Hey everyone,

    Today I decided to tell a friend of mine.......on top of all I have been dealing with the last 1.5 years.......my daughters drug and alcohol problem, her going off to army, the end of a romantic relationship, my brothers funeral, car wreck, shingles, financial.....etc etc.....

    That I have been in a cult that I have been working my way out of. I have never told her about this part of my life. I found myself ashamed at some of the things I was telling her .......what I had been taught, like being a chosen people, shunning, the mind control, never feeling good enough....staying away from "worldly" people etc etc. She kinda laughed at some of it.........and said you don't believe all that do you?

    I told her I was about at the end of the process. That today I felt sorrow and sadness. That I knew that some of my friends, if they knew would not be able to speak to me anymore. And even my mother. She was shocked. I told her that the religion and the organization came first and that it was their love for God that motivated them to do so...........BOINGGG!!!

    Of course there is more to tell, but no one likes super long posts!!!

    I am applying for a job as a designer for a nationwide furniture store that has a store in my area. I was in the furniture business for 10 years and got out to persue spiritual things, not be so materialistic, and look after the last years of raising my kids. This is a big step and statement for me. It was a passion and my God-given talent. I understand when people say how they feel badly for getting paid to do something they love so much.

    I have worked way way below my skills for a long time. But I kept a job that is not complacent, so really I did not get lazy. Anyway,

    It says I have a new message in my inbox but there is no message there. Maybe the culprit will post on this thread and I can at least know who it is!!!!

    It's time for me to move on ...........well I am always moving on........just time to make needed changes to keep on keeping on. I can't say I regret all of my past, I am learning so much. And I figure as long as I keep loving more deeply, it's all good.

    Thanks for reading my post,

    and have a great evening!!!

    purps

  • KW13
    KW13

    you shouldn't feel ashamed of who you are, you got away from something that a lot of people will never be brave enough to walk away from.

    you weren't fooled, you were straight lied to. how can you be to blame, when someone was telling you lies?

    your a great person, and things have been rough for ya recently - ((((purps))))

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa


    Thanks KW

    Just can't believe I told someone about my JW life........it seemed so crazy. And it was revealing a dark shameful secret.

    She is a wonderful person or I would not have been able to confide in her.

    purps ps I got my burner fixed........Thanks!

  • mama1119
    mama1119

    I know, isn't it weird to discuss it with people that have not been in it. I sometimes feel embarrassed that I was so ignorant before. But live and learn right!

  • KW13
    KW13

    Good to hear ya got your burner fixed :)

  • serendipity
    serendipity

    subject: Revelation

    Hi purps,

    Now that you've revealed it to one person, it will be easier to reveal it to another. Talking about those secrets removes their power and hold on you.

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    When I was DF for nine years(yes, I got myself reinstated after all that time) I never told one person about my JW life.

    It was a life that no one knew about, but I still felt it was the truth, so I never could have spoke badly of it.....or in a positive way.

    I felt like I was not fit to talk about it in my DF condition.

    oh wow........You've come a long way purpy!!!!!

  • juni
    juni


    That's wonderful purps! I wish you every success in what you love to do.

    Hugs,

    Juni

  • looking_glass
    looking_glass
    I can't say I regret all of my past, I am learning so much

    I think that is just one of the many things that you should be proud of! You have learned and moved on. Think of all the people both JWs and non that never learn but continue to plod thru life because they are too afraid to change and move head on. Good on ya!

    Life is learning experience. We will ALWAYS have things we will wish we had done/handled differently. But that is life.

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa
    That's wonderful purps! I wish you every success in what you love to do.

    Thanks.......think I will change my avatar to that pretty purple sofa!

    purps

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