Watchtower Camaraderie

The wanderer

Watchtower Camaraderie

After having spent years as one of Jehovah's Witnesses
I must admit that one of the most difficult issues that I
have had to face was the loss of close friends.

To a certain degree one of the things I miss the most
was the social interaction with the "brothers." How does
a person go from having all Jehovah's Witness friends
one day and then have absolutely no one to call a friend
the next day?

Going back to the Organization

A person would have to be insane to even consider
the remote possibility to go back to the organization;
after having done a historical background check on
the Watchtower Society. It crossed my mind once or
twice but I could never seriously entertain such
thoughts.

Picking up the Pieces

What drove me out of the organization in the first
place was the Watchtower Society's fiasco with the
United Nations. I felt I had no choice but to pack my
bags after months of research concerning this issue.

However, I now have a new set of problems with which
to deal with outside of my nice, cozy structured life and
that is learning how to deal with it all.

Asking for a Helping Hand

After observing this site in silence for months, it occurred
to me that there must be individuals who have suffered
the serious set backs of loneliness after having left the
"Watchtower World." I would really be interested to find
out how you have dealt with this issue of isolation?

Can anyone, give me advice regarding getting my life
back to normal outside of the"Watchtower World." I would
certainly be grateful.

Respectfully,

The Wanderer

Finally-Free

How does

a person go from having all Jehovah's Witness friends

one day and then have absolutely no one to call a friend

the next day?

I think that says it all. They never were "friends" in the first place.

For me, getting a pet helped a lot. Rocco, my bird, is my closest companion.

I also got involved with charity work in the community, and have met some great people there.

Welcome to the board.

W

drew sagan

One of the problems with our modern society is the way in which community has been slowly becoming less and less a part of our lives. More than every before in todays modern world can people live entire lives without ever having any kind of meaningful social connections.
Groups like the JWs appeal to our desire for a more community based enviroment. They will tempt you with pictures of an international brotherhood, a worldwide organization full of happy and healthy believers who want to be your friend.
It appeals to a need that we all have, a need of belonging. I feel that it is important we recognize that there are many apsects of modern society that will not fill this need, and that it is up to us to find HEALTHY ways in which to nurture it. The worst thing we can do is to fill this need with FALSE security, such as what the JW organization provides.

Bryan

I used alcohol to sooth my guilt and lonelyness.

PLEASE DON'T DO THIS!

After I sobered-up I volunteered at community theatres. GREAT EXPERIENCE! Artists are very accepting and love to party.

Try writing your feels down and put them away for awhile.

Bryan

IW

Can anyone, give me advice regarding getting my life

back to normal outside of the"Watchtower World."

First, I would suggest take it slow don't rush into anything. There is no "normal" Wanderer. What you thought was normal was the Watchtower's "normal." Out in the world there are a myriad of "normals", what we have to do is find our own normal. That takes time and it takes patience. Take it one day at a time and don't quickly trade the Watchtower's coat for someone's elses. Being alone for a time is hard but it also frees us. It gives us time to seek out ourselves and what we truly believe and want.

Second, just as we have learned to question the Watchtower we should also put to the test every other so called "authority" who claims to have the "truth" about something whether that truth is religious or anti-religious. JWs have not cornered the market on "followers of followers" that is a human trait that is alive and well among all mankind. Neither JWs, nor exJWs, nor politicians, nor the religious, nor the anti-religious, nor scientists etc. are immune from group think and herding. Try to find some balance and perspective, examine both sides of every issue.

Third, read, read, read, about anything and everything that interests you. Also search out a local group of people who are involved in something worthwhile in your community such as helping the poor or protecting the environment or anything you feel is important and positive. You might be surprised how easy it is to find friends among people who are working to do good in their community. Keep to positive pursuits in your life!

Fourth, it is said that when one loses a mate in death they should give themselves at least a year or more before making any life changing decisions, it's the same with leaving the JWs it too is a death of sorts. This is a time to grow, give yourself that time and don't add to your troubles by making wrong choices just to avoid the loneliness in your life.

Hoping all the best for you,

IW

wonderwoman

"Groups like the JWs appeal to our desire for a more community based enviroment. They will tempt you with pictures of an international brotherhood, a worldwide organization full of happy and healthy believers who want to be your friend. "

well said.
it always amazed me that one minute you could have 100 friends in 20 congregations, and the next they treated you like the devil himself. it is all based on fear and manipulation. i am sure some of my "friends" were sad about my choices, some probably expected it. either way, they do what their told...shun the 'wicked'.
there are so many amazing people you haven't met yet, that will be true friends and will love you unconditionally.
take this time now to get to know yourself. as an independant thinker and lovely person.
this site is great. i for one had no idea there were so many peole like me. it's very theraputic.

juni

However, I now have a new set of problems with which

to deal with outside of my nice, cozy structured life and

that is learning how to deal with it all.

Welcome Wanderer to the board. I know you will find many new friends here who are always ready to listen. I quoted a part of your statement above. Those words of yours are so true!! Everything in your life was planned out. You knew what your decisions were because they had already made them for you. Now you don't have that and it can be a little scary. Just like a toddler letting go of someone's hand for the first time and walking on his own.

Take time to enjoy what you like to do. Get to know yourself better. Then expand out to other people. I volunteered and met many wonderful people. You will find that "those terrible worldly people" can be kind and supportive and a true friend w/o conditions.

Best to you on your new journey. Stop in and visit or post another Topic whenever you like.

Juni

drew sagan

this site is great. i for one had no idea there were so many peole like me. it's very theraputic.

We have all gone through some of the same expierances, and many (like me) have spent much time examining and researching what JWs and other groups like them do in order to have control of others.
Glad you where able to find the site and learn more, it's part of the step to recovery.

The wanderer

I would like to take the time to thank you all for the exceptional advice. I will study, learn and branch out now and in the near future.

For the time being, I will take it slow.

Thank you all once again,

The Wanderer

juni

You're welcome Wanderer! You've got a good, healthy attitude. That's great!

Juni

Watchtower Camaraderie

Watchtower Camaraderie

Going back to the Organization

Picking up the Pieces

Asking for a Helping Hand

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