20 WAYS TO BE A GOOD LIBERAL

by hillbilly 17 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  hillbilly

  As found elsewere on the net.....

  20 WAYS TO BE A GOOD LIBERAL
  1. You have to be against capital punishment, but
  support abortion on demand for 7 month term, viable fetuses.
  2. You have to believe that businesses create
  oppression and governments create prosperity.
  3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are
  more of a threat than nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Iran or Chinese and North Korean communists.
  4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding and ONLY
  Federally funded art is worthwhile.
  5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by
  historically cyclical changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUV's.
  6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual
  is beautiful.
  7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.
  8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how
  to read are somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
  9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but PETA
  activists do....even if they are blowing up people with bombs to make their point!!!
  10.You have to believe that being "given" self-esteem is more important than
  actually making the effort to earn it.
  11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to
  make "The Passion of the Christ" for financial gain.
  12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it
  supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it
  supports certain parts of the Constitution. If you don't know what we're
  talking about here......it's time you looked it up.
  13. You have to believe that Federal "taxing of the rich" is too low, but ATM
  fees are too high.
  14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more
  important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Gen. Robert E. Lee, and
  Thomas Edison.
  15.You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas
  and set-asides are not.
  16. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere
  it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge. You
  believe that Hollywood California has those people.
  17. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag queens and
  transvestites, often unclothed, should be constitutionally protected, and
  manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.
  18. You have to believe that Barbara Streisand and The Dixie Chicks know
  more about National Security than Condeleeza Rice.
  19. You have to believe that The New York Times and CNN are Patriotic and
  individuals that proudly display the American Flag are NUTS!!
  20. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right-wing
  conspiracy.
  GOD BLESS AMERICA............oops, can't say that if you're Liberal.

  ~Hill
• 

  SixofNine

  Numero Uno quality of conservatives: Be dishonest.
• 

  kid-A

  11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make "The Passion of the Christ" for financial gain.

  Yes, I can see how this is logically linked to "liberalism". Congrats, your post proves their is only 1 way to be a good "NEO-CON" : Be a f**king moron.

  Good thing you chose "Hill-billy" for your moniker, it helps you get away with your in-bred genetic deficiency! LOL
• 

  somebodylovesme

  In the name of equality ...
  
  
  20 Things You Have To Believe To Be A Republican Today
  
  1. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

  2. The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

  3. Government should relax regulation of Big Business and Big Money but crack down on individuals who use marijuana to relieve the pain of illness.

  4. "Standing Tall for America" means firing your workers and moving their jobs to India.

  5. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multinational corporations can make decisions affecting all humankind without regulation.

  6. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

  7. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

  8. Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins unless you someday run for governor of California as a Republican.

  9. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

  10. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our longtime allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

  11. HMOs and insurance companies have the interest of the public at heart.

  12. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

  13. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

  14. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

  15. A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is a solid defense policy.

  16. Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

  17. The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.

  18. You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have a right to adopt.

  19. What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the 1980s is irrelevant.

  20. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist; but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

  ... Both lists are full of stereotypes and are unfair. But we might as well include both.
• 

  JamesThomas

  I left my tomb of religious identity only to fall into the grave of political definitions. Perhaps my great travels are to nowhere.

  j
• 

  Fe2O3Girl

  Thanks for that. I have often wondered what I believed. Now I know.

  Rachel of the feminist breastfeeding working mother sandal wearing liberal class
• 

  Bstndance

  A woman can't be trusted with decisions.

  Something we can all agree with HAHAHA... just kidding...

  This thread is just meant to start a flame war. This board has people with pretty strong feelings on both sides of the aisle. As a centrist there are things on both lists that I agree and don't agree with. BUT, knowing that the nature of this thread is to get people peeved, I will keep my comments to myself as I know they won't change anyone's mind.
• 

  hillbilly

  Good thing you chose "Hill-billy" for your moniker, it helps you get away with your in-bred genetic deficiency! LOL

  Kid-A.... I hope that was'nt a personal attack, after all you dont know me from Jack....Hell, I even agree with Six of Nine now and again....

  I put stuff up here time to time just to see who I can piss off.... As for "Neo-con" ...well I don't know what that means. I remember when Democrats were like LBJ so I guess I am just a blue collar, union dues paying, gun owning working class stiff....

  I guess the best Clinton era policy was when they decided we couldnt ride horses on BLM land but any a** hole could snowmobile in Yellowstone....Yea...that's a Rhodes Scholar for ya......

  ~Hill
• 

  SirNose586

  Good list, somebodyloves me!
• 

  stillconcerned

  I laughed at both.

  But then, i have a high tolerance for ambiguity...