Shunned - but still friends?

by GermanXJW 22 Replies latest jw friends

  • heretic
    The WTS teaches that DFing or shunning is an act of love.

    i know 'the loving arrangement' what a blessing!

  • BlackSwan of Memphis
    BlackSwan of Memphis
    We decided to write back that it is emtionally too exhausting for us to have contact just now and then. I mentioned that we do not really know what was the reason for their dumping us.

    I can sympathize.

    We had fairly decent contact with my family finally, but the day after I found out about my sister's home birth to her baby girl, we got shunned by my niece in law. I hesitate to say in law, as we were just family.

    Other then that, we haven't heard from them.

    I just finally got tired of the rollercoaster ride. I don't want some relationship that is I get contacted when something Major happens or we're allowed to contact them when something Major happens.

    As my husband said: What are the rules we're supposed to follow to keep them in our lives?

    Maybe it is burning a bridge, but sometimes it's just needed. Besides, I don't think bridges are ever gone forever. These people know that you left, you're gone (or whatever the case may be). If ever they really decide to walk away I think its a pretty safe bet, you'd find each other again.

  • OnTheWayOut
    Put another way, 'we stil wish we could be friends, but the religion stops us."

    Show them some empathy and you might just plant seeds of doubt that can grow until they can challenge the WT in their lives.

    I agree with James Free. They recognize that the religion itself, is the reason they must break ties. Try to remember they are
    in a mind-control cult, occasionally send them something that shows you care. Remind the wife that they are saying
    the WTS says we have to shun you, otherwise we like you.

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