About 8 years ago I was having some health issues. The doctors suspected cancer and I was scheduled for a biopsy. I came very, very close to banning my mother from the hospital because I knew she would use the opportunity to drum up attention for herself. A worldly friend told me to re-think the decision. So I did but I also told her that I was in no mood to have her cell phone ringing non-stop while I faced most somber event in *my* life. She promised to turn the phone off and just return any calls when she got home.
Before my actual diagnosis, she had already told people in her congregation (most of whom knew me personally) that I had 'Terminal Cancer'. Oh!! Woe is HER!! She deflected all inquiries to herself so that I wouldn't be disturbed. Two people contacted me directly and got a very different report about my health and my interest in being with them.
The cancer was in no way 'Terminal' but my mother still used the opportunity to her full advantage. She regularly received money from the congregation delivered to her in an envelope by an elder that I went to pioneer school with. Since my mother [claims she] didn't know what the money was for - and it certainly was not for her inactive daughter with "terminal" cancer - she kept the money for herself.
I don't know just how much was given to her but I never saw any of it. During the entire 18 months of my treatment my mother was too busy to assist in any tiny aspect of my care. One day at the beginning of my treatment I needed to go to the emergency room. I phoned my mom to ask for help with this. Silly me. It was Saturday morning and if she took time to help me get to the emergency room, she would be late for her 10am bible study and that would set a terrible example to her new
victim study. She actually went out of her way to keep all attention on herself. Her brother, my uncle, came out to see our family. He - being the pagan worldly man that he is - figured that if you actually visit one person, the others will come over. It was enlightening to see the extent (and outright lies) that my mom went to in order to keep the spotlight on herself. (8 years later, my uncle still brings it up.) It was shockingly unbelievable to him and he has said numerous times that he would not have believed it if he had not seen it himself when her deviousness was exposed on the last day of his visit when all of us (he, mom, me, my sister, my two brothers and one sister-in-law) were finally together and he made the simple comment of "I wish I could have spent more time with everybody but I understand that you are all busy people." I started it by saying: "Busy people?? Are you shitting me?? We cleared our schedules, two of us took off work, we all kept calling and asking when we could come see you and where would you be so we could join you. We all sat home and stayed by our phones just waiting for the call. I made 6 calls myself yesterday. MOM?? Didn't you tell him that we were trying to meet up??" While she kept him busy, she fielded our calls and then told him things like 'Aude says she'll try to make it but she's not sure.' Bold Faced LIAR.
But hey!! At least she didn't humiliate me in front of a stadium full of people or my own child.
Apparently, most parents act in bizzare ways when their children (adults and minors) face cancer treatment but ALL Cult Parents Suck BIG Time!