by MsMcDucket 11 Replies latest jw friends
They are happily enjoying being witnesses. They are young and beautiful. I don't know what to say? When they came over today (to pick up a check), they look healthy (a bit too healthy) and happy. I asked them how things were going, and they said fine! They love the "brothers and sisters" and love meeting people (witnesses) from various parts of the country. I guess it beats being in a gang, on drugs, on welfare, etc... Hell! I don't know!
I love my girls! I miss them. Life goes on. Right?
Nice to see your good attitude on that. It took some time to get there though didn't it? Usually does anyway.
Healing is heathy too.
Jeff
Owwww...
Hugs...
I have two daughters, they've been raised by my Dubbie ex. Fortunately she was 'spiritually weak' and is now largely 'inactive'. The girls aren't really believers, they go along to the Memorial if they're taken to kee[p the grandmother happy I'm lucky.
But they're not in gangs on on anything either... it must be so hard. How old are they? Mine are 16 and 13. I don't know how much credit I can take for them not getting sucked in (touch wood). It's more I've been able to answer questions they've asked largely of their own accord that help them 'see' sometimes.
My girls are 19.
I think it's disgusting that the only way they'll Associate™ with you is when it involves them getting money from you.
If being part of the Christian Congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses™ makes them so frikkin happy, maybe they should try to get some money from their Loving™ Brothers™ and Sisters™, instead of from their mother, whom they are supposed to shun as being in league with Satan the Devil™.
I'm really sorry that they are using you like this. You deserve so much better. If you can, try to find a way to stop rewarding their psychological abuse by giving them money when they want/need it, and insist that if they are going to treat you that way unless there is money involved, that you cannot continue to give them money. They either treat you properly ALL the time, or your purse gets shut tight.
Besides, how do you know that they aren't putting part of the money you give them into the Contribution Box™? Do you really want to contribute to the WTS, even indirectly by financing your daughters' JW lifestyle?
Make no mistake about it: Just because JWs dress up nice and smile pretty and don't do drugs, what they do to families is thug warfare, plain and simple.
Like Abaddon said....Owwwww! That just hurts.
Maybe someday they'll wake up and smell the dry rot rising up off of the decaying mess that is the WTS. I'll be hoping, anyway.
Make no mistake about it: Just because JWs dress up nice and smile pretty and don't do drugs, what they do to families is thug warfare, plain and simple.
Scully, you are right. I am an enabler; but if I have to pay to see them, that's what I have to do. One twin was involved in a wreck in April that destroyed the car (my car) that I had given them. I gave them the balance of the insurance payment, after the lienholder was paid off, to put towards another vehicle. Right now, they are STILL in college. I hope to keep them in college as long as possible. They will need a viable skill to support themselves. They are not in their right minds, so to speak; so I have to do what I can.
Would you believe that some kindly "brother" lent them his car to get around until they could get their own? He said it didn't matter if they kept it for 3 months or 3 years. I don't like them asking other witnesses for anything. I think that this is a way the witnesses get people to feel that they owe them, which makes them less likely to leave the religion when they start having second thoughts. You know what I mean?
I'm between a rock and a hard place!
Just shows how much you love them, MsMcDucket. You're looking towards the long term, towards one fine day when they wake up from their zombie walking and it all pays off. You'll be so glad you kept on decentl terms with them. Hang in there!
Scully, you are right. I am an enabler; but if I have to pay to see them, that's what I have to do. One twin was involved in a wreck in April that destroyed the car (my car) that I had given them. I gave them the balance of the insurance payment, after the lienholder was paid off, to put towards another vehicle. Right now, they are STILL in college. I hope to keep them in college as long as possible. They will need a viable skill to support themselves. They are not in their right minds, so to speak; so I have to do what I can.Would you believe that some kindly "brother" lent them his car to get around until they could get their own? He said it didn't matter if they kept it for 3 months or 3 years. I don't like them asking other witnesses for anything. I think that this is a way the witnesses get people to feel that they owe them, which makes them less likely to leave the religion when they start having second thoughts. You know what I mean?
I'm between a rock and a hard place!
Ms McDucket
I apologize if it sounded like I was criticizing what you're doing.... that wasn't my intention. It just kills me to see a good person like you being treated with such contempt - you obviously love your girls and are still looking out for their best interests.
My JW relatives do similar things with me.... completely ignore me and pretend I don't exist... until somebody wants/needs money from me. Grrrrrr. It's sickening.... and I'm merely "inactive", not DFd or DAd.
MsMcD
Right now, they are STILL in college. I hope to keep them in college as long as possible. They will need a viable skill to support themselves. They are not in their right minds, so to speak; so I have to do what I can.
Yeah, my policy with family is "They're in a high control group, I am an adult". Sometime you just have to be big. And at college they might absorb enough to start doubting or meet nice worldly guys who will 'corrupt' them out of 'the toof' nd into normality
I don't know if it's possible for you to get them to "try and build you up spiritually", or get you back to meetings by having conversations with them where you explain all your troubles and doubts with Dubbiedum (in a nice, non threatening, "I need you to help me think right as I know this can't be" way), and by doing so get to tell them all the things you know and NOT have them stop listening as you'd not be attacking their beliefs but they'd be trying to defend their.
