Do you REALLY want to know?

by serendipity 28 Replies latest social relationships

  • serendipity
    serendipity

    GMoney, you share some of your sexcapades here. Your comments are interesting.

  • nikan8ter
    nikan8ter

    No . . . . really I don't. Either way. Weather they have had 1 or a 100. Let me tell you . . . you don't want to know either. And contrary to popular belief number of partners has nothing to do with wheather your partner has a disease or not.

    Just ponder this - you ask the question . . . are you prepared for the answer . . . . . . probably not!!

    No matter what it is, what if they say 1000 and you freak? Or even worse what if they say 1 and your more like 1000? Are either of you different because of the amount of people or lack there of you have slept with? NO! but because you've asked the question no matter what is said - it will not be what you expected - and it may make you both uncomfortable to discuss it. TRUST ME - LEAVE IT ALONE . . . . . as long as your both healthy and happy it doesn't matter. Don't mess it up with questions about the past.

  • fullofdoubtnow
    fullofdoubtnow

    It doesn't matter to me, and I would never ask. The past is gone, what matters to me is our future together.

  • Forscher
    Forscher

    These days it would be wise to make sure they are disease free. Beyond that it isn't that important.
    Forscher

  • pooka
    pooka

    My answer if asked would be honest one. It's in the past...............

  • pooka
    pooka

    My answer if asked would be honest one. It's in the past...............

  • YoursChelbie
    YoursChelbie
    Is it important for you to know how many sexual partners your love interest had before you would consider him/her for a long term relationship, leading to marriage? Why would that info be important to you?

    Would a guy be able to be in a committed relationship with me if he has a history of having numerous sex partners? I'd be doubtful. Simply put, if he's had sex with people he barely knows without taking the time to establish a relationship over the course of several months at least, then he actually is just after sex. If someone spends time engaging in risky behavior with the possibility for unwanted pregnancies and STD’s just for fun, well that’s just plain stupid IMHO.

    I wouldn’t want to waste my time with a guy who hops from one meaningless fling after another. They aren’t people I’d have anything in common with if I wanted a meaningful long-term relationship.

    YC

  • nikan8ter
    nikan8ter

    I just wanted to breifly comment on your post YoursChelbie -

    While I understand your concern that a potential partner may not be true to you, the number of partners he has had - or the relationship he has had with them is not determinative of his level of caring for you.

    Each person you meet is a different story. The point is you can't judge a persons ability to be honerable or caring by the number of partners they have had. Its more important how they treat you! If they treat you bad, leave, but don't sacrifice what could be a wonderful relationship because you are trapped by a belief that the number of partners they have had in the past somehow reveals that they are not going to be a good and kind person to you. Its simply not true. Their actions now are what counts.

  • YoursChelbie
    YoursChelbie


    Believe me that I understand your point. However, the same thing could be said of a gambler or someone else with an ingrained habit I don't consider healthy. If they are going to change their ways that's fine. This change really needs to happen way before I come into the picture. They should change for themselves--not for me.

    YC

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