I'm in love with a Jehovah Witness, Is it really a losing battle?

by icon 32 Replies latest social relationships

  • Phil
    Phil

    ask her if she wants to marry you or the Watchtower. All the responses given in this thread are ligitimate. There is a heap of experience being donated on your behalf. The watch tower is a cult and as such, the pressure on your future marriage will be enormous, there is no doubt here. Good luck.

  • EAGLE-1
    EAGLE-1

    I married a non-jw and nobody said anything.Not even my parents have said anything.Of course I do have this demonic look on my face most of the time.

    My non-jw wife has been an inspiration to me.Anyway if I am going to worship something I want it to have nice legs.

    The jw you wish to marry is rebelling.Exploit this.Marry the person and move away.

    Life is full of obstacles.Either go around them or blow them up.

    Read Sun Tzu

    Good LUCK

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    There are mixed marriages that work. But in the ones that have, there is a mutual respect and give-and-take that makes it all worthwhile. There is a lot of communication, and what will be accepted or tolerated has been negotiated. Typically the JW partner is willing to give up the KH wedding and tolerate the disdain of her peers. The non-JW partner must accept that their love will be gone to meetings and obligations for a good part of the week.

    Can you "convert" another person? Possibly. But they have to want it. If she is content in her JW identity? Then why would you want to yank her away from the only life she knows?

    I like how Kid-A has laid it out on the line. You are being asked to sacrifice your identity, sneak around, lie about your motives ...so that she can have her Kingdom Hall wedding. We supervised at least one other fella on the board who did this. After he agreed to study and baptism, she started to put pressure on him to go out in field service. We all know what comes next. He would be expected to "reach out" to be a Ministerial Servant, then Elder. To do any less would be to be viewed as "spiritually weak" The young man in question was only going through the motions to keep the love of his life.

    He was very miserable, but he felt he had no choice, he was in love.

    Do you have a choice?

  • sass_my_frass
    sass_my_frass

    Sorry hon, but her family is totally using you. Her mum thinks that you'll come around because you're 'nice', therefore she can use your money for her business. Tell me that you haven't given her mum money, please?! Your love thinks that it will all be okay as long as you're married. Once you're married you'll see the light and eventually she'll win you without a word. She sounds dumb, sorry about that.

    Don't you have something better to do with your life than slave for a loveless family, and for her love?

  • eve342832
    eve342832

    hi,im eve from scotland and i am not a jw,but met the most adorable man 10years ago.He was a disfellowshipped jw,purely because he didnt love his wife anylonger.i might ad this all happened before i met him and i wasnt the cause of the divorce.His name is cole and for 7yrs the jw's still tried to control him and take him away from me and my son which eventually happened.Cole went back to the study and meetings and for 2yrs only had limited contact with me and my son.Then he changed from the strict jw to the cole i knew.Jw are against any behavior that takes place out of wedlock and especially with a non jw woman.This relationship went on even though cole knew it was against every believe he had.He did love me but was taught to believe that because i was a non jw that i couldnt be saved, and i refused to believe in what they say..I BELIEVE IN GOD,but i will not have anyone translate to me how the bible reads from jw's translations.Cole and our intimate hidden relationship carried on until i realised i was carrying Cole's child.I refused to tell Cole about the child as Cole would be disfellowshipped for being involved with me.He would lose everything he believed in,they would shun him and he would lose his family and without all that he would die.I stopped all contact and tried to move on ,8 weeks later i lost Cole's baby and after 5 months of illness i contacted Cole,only to explain and hope he'd forgive me,he tell's me he is getting married.I have been to his house and pleaded with him not to marry her.Col told me he still loves me and always will but he has to move on because i am not a jw and never will be.Cole said one time that to love me was the best but to lose me at armageddon and have me taken away would be too painfull.I now sit here knowing that this man ive had in my life for ten years and loved and adored more than life itself,has gone.Im not even allowed to text him just to see if he's ok.There is nothing in this life that could cause me pain like this.Cole has lead a life of lies because he loves me but cant be with me.You ask is it all worth it?I dont know.All i want is to hear his laugh,to have him hold me and to see his smile and to make it all ok again.Eve.

  • ballistic
    ballistic

    god, that's so sad eve, so sad. I'm sorry.

  • eve342832
    eve342832

    Thank you for being so kind,i found this by site by chance and maybe thought i would find some hope, and some peace.Thats all im looking for really.

  • cr1234
    cr1234

    RUN!!! DON'T LOOK BACK!!! SHE IS NEVER GOING TO PUT YOU FIRST EVER!!! I'M SORRY THAT THS ISN'T WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR BUT IT IS THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER!!!!

    WISH YOU THE BEST

  • pudgey1
    pudgey1

    I really feel for you eve...that really is so sad...i hope you can find some comfort on this site everyone is very supportive

    pudgey

    hugs and xxxxxx

  • eve342832
    eve342832

    Thank you pudgey,you to have kind words and peoples hearts in mind as does Ballistic,who has a great smile.It has been a long time since recieving any comfort about the whole situation.Im sure we are here to be tested sometimes ,hope its all worth it.Eve.xx

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