JWs and relationship immaturity?

by jstalin 22 Replies latest jw friends

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  jstalin

  My JW friend seems to be unusually immature when it comes to relationships and women. I don't think he's ever had a serious relationship with a woman (he's 23). He uses the terms "womens" when he speaks about women, and he uses the word "boobies." It's totally immature. He turns red whenever I bring up the subject of sex. At the same time, he seems to hide behind his JW-ism to avoid relationships - he says he doesn't want to date, but that he in fact can't because he can only date JWs.

  Man - I think he's psychologically messed up and I don't think he will be able to have a real emotional relationship with a women when/if he comes to that point.

  Is this common amongst JWs, or is he just odd and happens to be a JW?
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  Dr Jekyll

  Its common amongst brothers. Think about it, you are not allowed to get close to a member of the opposite sex unless you are actually dating. The only Female association you get is with your mother. How on earth are you suppose to get to know girls in an atmosphere like that.

  To compound the problem a lot of Brothers end up marrying the first sister they date. They have NO experience with girls.
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  Wasanelder Once

  He's gay.

  W.Once
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  Dr Jekyll

  Thinking about the dub dating thing and how rapidly things go from "you're nice" to "I do" worldly people date a lot more people before settling down, in dubdom if you date more than 5 different sisters you end up getting a reputation (And not a good one)
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  jstalin

  He's gay.

  I have that strong suspicion... though I feel bad for the guy in that as long as he's a JW, he could never admit it.
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  Dr Jekyll

  The guy might just be shy about talking about girls and dating to a worldly bloke. I know at that age I was. I went through school being the butt of "Matt's a virgin" jokes and then when I started work I was the butt of a lot of "Matt's a Eunuch" jokes. Because of the dub stance on premarital sex male dubs end up being the butt of a lot of sexual jokes. Maybe he just wants to avoid these from you.

  Correct me if I'm wrong but JS but you are gay aren't you and you're pretty open about it, if he was in the closet I don't think he'd be associating with you for fear of temptation.
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  jstalin

  The guy might just be shy about talking about girls and dating to a worldly bloke. I know at that age I was. I went through school being the butt of "Matt's a virgin" jokes and then when I started work I was the butt of a lot of "Matt's a Eunuch" jokes. Because of the dub stance on premarital sex male dubs end up being the butt of a lot of sexual jokes. Maybe he just wants to avoid these from you.

  Correct me if I'm wrong but JS but you are gay aren't you and you're pretty open about it, if he was in the closet I don't think he'd be associating with you for fear of temptation.

  I take it very easy on him... no jokes or crass sexual conversation. Usually he'll bring something up like "I went to a car show this weekend and there were some hawt chicks." Then he turns red, like he's trying really hard to bring up chicks. I usually don't bring the subject up unless he does. He doesn't know I'm gay... he's never asked... lol.
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  Dr Jekyll

  Sounds like he is just shy
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  streets76

  Years ago it was not uncommon for a young sister to hook a young brother by giving him his first BJ. Don't know about these days.
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  Poodles

  I can only comment on how my boyfriend acts because he is still a JW! He also was raised in a strict family of JW's and because of the way they felt about sex a person can only go one of two ways when they get old enough and that is to go against the church or obey all the rules of their church!

  My boyfriend choose to break many of his church's rule before and after his divorce because his parents/church was too strict!! I'm sure his church still has a strong hold on him because he still hides our relationship from EVERYONE in his life!! Also, he fears his family shunning him the worst!!

  Paula