E-mail response from an old dub friend......

by schne_belly 16 Replies latest jw experiences

  • schne_belly

    Okay, so I suppose I asked for this...but regardless I'm ready to puke! Last week I E-mailed an old "dub" friend from another city. She's had some health issues and I hadn't heard from her for a few months, and wanted to know how she was doing....her brother also recently got married and I asked about that as well. ( as you can see by her response this issues don't matter)

    Okay, so you caught me, I KNOW why she was avoiding me. I had never told her I stopped attending meetings, nor intended to. I know gossip travels (obviously why she knows of my husband and in laws DFfing and DAing). I was pretty much testing the waters to see if she would be human and responsd to my loving concern and leave it at that, or if she would cross the line, like all my other "friends" have.... yeup, you guessed it.... read for yourself...... how would you respond?

    Hi Krissie

    I am at work but wanted to say hello to you. I got your email last week and it sounds like you have been enjoying the nice weather also. Yesterday we went to the park for almost 2 hours! It was fun!

    I wanted to also write and tell you that I was sorry to hear about Pat and his parents wanting no longer to be part of Jehovah’s organization. I do not know whether you have chosen to take the same path as they or not. And you do not need to justify, explain, or defend what they are feeling, or how you are feeling. We all are going to stand before Jehovah and be judged by him-therefore judging isn’t up to any one of us.

    I know you have been raised in the truth Krissie-as have I, so we have really had to prove the truth to ourselves. Just make certain that you continue to do that please. I know with ***** ( her sister who's husband left her) it was such a struggle to go to meetings and in service alone. So I know that would be a hard thing for you to do also-but she did it and you can too. And it’s not just about whether we love Jehovah or not…it’s about loving Jehovah and his organization-working together in unity to bring praise to Jehovah. This world is going down hill fast and within the last year repeatedly we have been reminded that we are living in the end, of the end of this system. Pray about things Krissie. I know that you love your husband and you love his family. Jehovah loves you Krissie-he has drawn you to his organization. I hope that you treasure that and let Jehovah help you.

    Well I have wanted to say something to you for awhile. Again-I am not writing to make you feel that you need to explain your reasoning’s or to make you feel you have to defend people. Just as I am not going to write and justify or defend the truth. I know what I believe, I have no doubts, I have full and complete confidence in the bible and in the direction that Jehovah is taking his organization. And I have a daughter now to think about. The safest place she can be is in the congregation where people are looking out for her and loving her so much. You know what the truth is about Krissie, you have wonderful parents that took great care of you and taught you well. But now only you can decide if it’s what you want. I just want you to know that you are a special person and that I have been thinking about you.

    Enjoy the sunshine today!! J



  • SickofLies

    It all depends on what you want, do you just want to remain friends or do you want to explain to her why you left?

  • ButtLight

    I would take that oppertunity to explain yourself. Do it in a "innocent" way. Tell her you love Jehovah, but are confused as to the things the wts has been doing. Bring up the un, and other things that are a proven fact, and ask her opionion on them! (get your foot in the door)

  • carla

    To me it sounds she doesn't want to hear the reason anybody would leave. It jah's org and that's that!

  • schne_belly

    Ya, I guess I'm not taking offense to the E-mail itself. Compared to others I've gotten from" friends", this one was pretty decent.

    I know that even though she says I'm a special friend and that Jehovah loves me, if I dare tell her this is MY decision to not go to meetings, and that I'm not going back, I won't be a "special friend "anymore, and to her, I'd be dead in Gods eyes..... that is what upsets me. She doesn't really mean this.... so why even say it?! I think I will responsd, be honest, and then call her on the carpet, and really see if she'll let it be and trust that GOD will judge me...so there is no need for her to.

    I'm prepared to never hear from her again.... it's happend many times before from those who I thought were friends. I guess keep thinking "this one may be different"?!

  • freedomlover

    oh man, I've gotten some of these emails as well.

    "I don't want to tell you what to do, but you are wrong as long as you aren't doing what I'm doing."

    that's what I hear in those kind of letters.

    I wouldn't bother to write back, but that's just me.

    but, yes, barf!

  • Frannie Banannie
    Frannie Banannie
    you do not need to justify, explain, or defend what they are feeling, or how you are feeling.

    Sounds like a typical one-way jdubya street to me. She admonishes this, but then goes on to spend the rest of the email justifying her beliefs to you and admonishing you to do the same.


  • Highlander

    couldn't agree more Frannie.

    I'd email her back reminding her that she didn't want justification from you, but her entire email consisted of justication of her beliefs.

  • Virgochik

    What a shame. That poor woman is deeply brainwashed and writes like a zombie. Sadly, reading between the lines, I'd say the "special friendship" is on shaky ground, unless you reassure her of what she wants to hear from you.

    An honest explanation of where you stand and what you believe might be too much for her to handle, but you never know when a small seed is planted. Years from now, if she comes to have doubts, at least she will know of someone she can talk to.

    I'm so sorry, it hurts to find out someone wasn't a true friend, always thru thick and thin.

  • Odrade

    "wow friend, I was just checking in to see how you are coping with your health and family. Didn't expect the shepherding call, but you know what they say: 'Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!' Really, I do hope you are well. Love, Krissie."

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