Sigh, March 17

by lola28 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • lola28

    Here it is the anniversary of my baptism. It has been five years since I was baptized and I wish I could take it back. I woke up this morning feeling incredibly sad, lonely and what’s worse I woke up feeling empty. This feeling of emptiness is not a new one; I have felt this way for a while, but today this feeling is just too much it feels like I am drowning. I don’t know how to rid myself of this feeling, I don’t know how to feel okay again, and does that even make sense?


  • unique1

    It is in the past. No sense in dwelling on it now. You can't change it, but what you can change is the future. So start living your life now. Throw on some Green beads or a clover leaf in celebration of St. Patty's Day and revel in your rebellion.

  • Highlander

    My brother and I were baptized on the same day. I was 18, he was 13. Every year, on the date we were baptized, he sends me a text message to remind

    me of this 'wonderful, special, priviledged, etc. etc. moment.' Makes me wanna puke!!!

    I agree Lola,, wish I could take it back.

  • lola28

    I got baptized on the same day with a really close friend of mine, today we would normally do something to celebrate, I have my cell phone off just because I know she is going to call and I don't want to have to talk to her.


  • Hawkeye

    Hi Lola,

    Wow! You reminded me of my baptism. It was ten years ago today!!!

    Give yourself some time. Start getting involved in other things that interest you. Do something that is just for YOU.

    Time really does heal the wounds. I would have forgotten that this was my baptism date if I hadn't read your thread. You will too someday. This junk becomes less of an issue as time goes on. Surround yourself with friends outside of the WTS. If you don't have any yet, Make some! There are truly some wonderful people out there. WTS makes you think that all people who are not JW's are demonic. Not true! I have met some wonderful people on this forum.

    Keep your head held high! you have nothing to feel bad, or ashamed about.

    Christian love,


  • whyamihere

    Just like Hawkeye said....Time heals all wounds.

    As each year passes you forget....I know I got baptized in June....the day? clue what day.


  • prophecor

    Hi Lola.

    Wish I could make you feel better. I know cyber hugs can do little in a situation like this, but I'll hug you anyway. You might feel better once the time has past. You're always welcome here.

    Time will wind up straightening out a lot of the things that may seem out of place to you right now. You're young and have a lot of precious time in front of you. It's OK for you to feel this way, after all, you're only 5 seconds away from having been a teenager. Hopefully, more than anything else, you're just going thru growing pains.

    Lots of folk here have a lot of affection for you. Me included. Try to keep your head up, hon. Time has a way of fixing everything.

    Love You

    I wish the best for you on this day, and the hours and moments to come.


  • daystar

    As others have said, time will do it. Or, you can make up a different reason for this day to be special to you and celebrate that instead.

  • lola28

    Hi Prophy,

    Thank you so much for everything, I know that you really are concerned about me and I thank you for caring. I’m just feeling down, I have been feeling really low this whole week, maybe because I have been really sick and haven’t taken a moment to really rest and take care of myself, maybe it’s because I’m 12 ½ or maybe because it is raining outside, I don’t know what it is, I just want to feel okay again.


  • heathen

    So you're feeling low because you can't celebrate your baptism? Most people around here would be happy about being out of a mind control cult . Just because you are out does not mean you are not still a christian or a good person which you seem to me anyway . I think being out makes people a better person actually since they lose that judgemental air around them and realize they do have more time for family and friends . I think the only woman in the bible mentioned as being baptized was lydia so I think that it is for men only anyway . I think the WTBTS really screws women by forcing them to go door to door and such . anyway cheer up already will ya ........

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