My mother snapped at me today

by collegegirl21 16 Replies latest jw experiences

  • collegegirl21

    So my mom comes downstairs to use the computer and I forget to pick up the stuff I printed off, which was about the Shunned Father's story. And when my mom came upstairs, I was up getting a beer and talking with my dad, she snaps, "Don't you ever print anything off about Jehovahs Witnesses on my computer anymore." That was it for me, "Well I'm sorry that you need to find out about the truth. Don't get pissed off at me because I was just printing something off for your knowledge."

    Then she talks about how my grandma died because of a blood transfusion. Which I don't believe is the case, I think my mom is just using as a scapegoat because she wants to see my grandma again in the "resurrection." At that point because my grandma was the most precious person in the world to me, I just snapped, "I guess you are too close minded to look at anything other than what they are telling you to think. I'm sorry for trying to give you some I thought you would find interesting. And by the way mom, we can accept blood as JW - you saw it, just not in whole, what does that say? So don't get pissed at me."

    I walk away and come back downstairs, I'm furious right now. I hate how she thinks she knows everything about everything. I hate how I am not allowed to think for myself. I hate how I can't have my own F-ing opinion. I thought it would take me a year to let go, but I'm thinking its going to be crazy for me to stay in that long. I have to find a way to get money and get my own car and get the F out immediately. I'm going crazy inside and I'm starting to cry more and get sad more, and that's just not who I am.

    What to do?

  • ballistic

    hey collegegirl, it must be hard, but I hate to sound like your dad now... they do have your best interests at heart. As we ALL grow older, we realise our parents aren't the entire universe or an authority on just about anything. People in any religion or not discover that. Well, my dad died to the blood issue, so I was talking about my mum. No they are not the life giving god's we thought they were, but they still love you, try to keep it smooth.

  • kittyeatzjdubs


    hey sweetie! i'm so sorry you're having such a $hitty night...just keep reminding yourself that you'll be out soon enough and you can live your life how you want it.

    do you still have those ''leftovers''? that might help too.

    luv you hun!!!

    luv, jojo

  • collegegirl21

    The leftovers... I definitely forgot about that. Thanks hon! Its just hard because when I am around them I feel like I lose a piece of myself, or the little bit that I am finding out about myself.

  • EAGLE-1

    When I was still at home I would just play along and pretend to be a jw.Sometimes I would show some resistance but I wanted keep the peace.Even when I was putting on my act I would still catch hell.Could not seem to do anything right in my parents eyes.I feel that I deserve an academy award for my performance.Even today I pretend to my boss that I love my job and all the political crap that goes along with it.Being in that org makes one feel like an enemy agent on enemy territory.Lies and deception become part of the game.I was caught reading books on other religions and the occult.My defense was this--Dad I was reading up on this so I would know what to say at the door in case someone believe this way.Tell her your doing research and play along.Pretend for a while.Might as well practice now, you will be doing it throughout your life.

  • damselfly

    I find that with my mom I instantly turn into a child whenever we argue. Which frustrates me immensely!

    She could be reacting this way if she feels she is going to "lose you" to the "world." Just try to remain calm and start thinking about your future. Do you have a place to go stay? Money? Job? etc? It nevers hurts to plan ahead just in case.


  • sass_my_frass

    Ooo yeah bad news; doesn't matter how old you get - your mother will be older, and will know you very well (she was you) and yet you're still a total mystery to each other. Just for the sake of peace in your lives in these 'last days' (of your living in her house, man that expression just about made me puke) just learn to take a few deep breaths, count to ten, do that thing.... just take it easy. Your time will come soon, just be patient luv.

  • jgnat

    HA! Some of this is your natural independence coming to the fore. My daughter and I had similar fights. Of course the Watchtower society makes it worse because they insert themselves in the middle.

    You will start feeling better when you realize you have a lot of power to make your own choices. Think about it. What can she really do?

  • greendawn

    A lot more ppl were saved by having blood transfusions than were harmed by them but the JWs just focus on the small negative side and ignore the much larger positive side of things. That's a typical propaganda attitude but as you said they are so incapable of independant thinking they can't go beyond the FDS ideas.

  • truthseeker


    Take a deep breath and relax - wait till you graduate, save up your money, get a car and get out.

    Believe me, there will be times when you will have to hold your breath - it's not worth the confrontation right now.

    Your mother is behaving in the expected way, she is unlikely to change overnight.

    You can drop "seeds" here and there, but she has already been conditioned to reject anything not in the Society's favor, print-outs will only make things worse.

    Reaffirm your love for her continually, so when the time comes, you will be ready and able to be on good terms with her.

    Check out Richie Rich's post if you haven't already, he is having similar problems with his mother.

    A year can go by quickly, although when you're suffering it can go as slow as a tortoise

    Truthseeker (of the understanding I want to help you class)

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