In my experience, those who become jw's as adults (not born in) could be described as abusers or abusees. More often than not, they have unresolved issues of abuse from their past and gravitate to the structure of the org to re-experience the controlling, abusive environment of their past as the victim or the perpetrator.
From what I've seen, the more these past abuse issues are dealt with, the less of a hold the org has on a person. I guess that's another reason the org frowns on therapy. Nothing like people being empowered to live their own lives abuse-free!
Has this been your experience? Think of all the jw's you know that converted as adults. Are they abusers or abusees?
tall penguin
Abusers and Abusees love the org...
by tall penguin 22 Replies latest jw friends
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tall penguin
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juni
Not that I'm aware of, but what abuser advertises??
Juni
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juni
Tall penguin,
2nd thought. My daughter had brought up a good point once that made sense. She said she thought that a lot of JW were probably abused in some way in the past and that was what attracted them to the org. Promises of brotherly love, paradise, etc. etc.
I thought she made a good point.
Juni
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Why Georgia
My mother in law was abused as a child. She said she was attracted to the WTS because the people seemed so perfect. She's been in since the 50's. Lately she's been talking about the lack of love in the congregation. I noticed her talk about this has also coincided with her being in therapy.
Chrystal
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mkr32208
I would say a high percentage of them has this problem but it's my experience that most religions are this way...
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tall penguin
bttt (I'd like to hear more comments on this)
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R6Laser
Some of the stuff you guys come up is amazing. I don't know what type of world you live in, but there are millions of people out there that had pasts that include abuse or other similar problems and most of them are not JW. Try again.
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tall penguin
R6laser, The wts is not the only framework that would attract those with abuse in their pasts. I'm asking what people's experience has been, attempting to understand patterns. Thanks for not getting it.
tall penguin -
Lady Lee
TP
From the research that has been done the highest risk factor for those to join a high control group is vulnerability. That vulnerability can take many shapes and forms:
- history of some kind of abuse (emotional, physical, sexual, spiritual)
- history of growing up or living with dysfunctional people (alcohols, parents with mental health issues, etc.)
- a recent loss that creates a personal instability (loss of job, death of a close family memberor friend, change in living situation, etc)
- isolation from normal relationships (moving away to attend college or to find a new job, immigrating to a new country, etc.)
Growing up with of some kind of family dysfunction teaches a child that the way they live is normal. Needing to find some kind of relolution or even finding a comfort zone could lead a person to join a high control group. Even when the control feels bad, or stressful, members will attribute the stress to themselves rather than to the rules and practices of the group.
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tall penguin
Thanks Lady Lee. I just find it so interesting that just about everyone I know who converted to jw as an adult fits into the abusee/abuser category. And I've also noticed that the more help these ones get (as in therapy or education) the less likely they are to stay witnesses or be active. My experience anyhow.
tall penguin