JW's do believe in Hell

by jstalin 26 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • ballistic
    ballistic
    Yes, and public restrooms will have complimentary Awake magazines available for your reading pleasure.

    but if you have public restrooms, you need people employed as toilet cleaners, and if you have toilet paper, you need factory workers to make it. You would need roads and trucks to transport it, so you need road builders and an automotive \ engineering industry, damnn now we got pollution, and we need police to stop people speeding.

    No - sorry toilet paper and public toilets are out of the question.... perhaps that's what all these people are doing ... wondering where to "go"

    http://www.watchtowerinformationservice.org/great_crowd_ascending_mt_of_jehovah.jpg

  • Dr Jekyll
    Dr Jekyll
    I knew John was a real tightarse by the way he sliced bread (thin as.. and impossible to butter - must have been a scot ) but I was shocked when I first used his dunny - strips of AWAKE!™ were all that he used (never the Watchtower but!)

    AWAKE!™ with staples, unc

    Isn't that worthy of a JC, wiping your bottom on Jehovah's spiritual food?

  • Dr Jekyll
    Dr Jekyll
    No - sorry toilet paper and public toilets are out of the question.... perhaps that's what all these people are doing ... wondering where to "go"

    No Jehovah will provide an army of small chiwahwahs for dubs to wipe their bottoms on (All that fruit its gonna be a bit messy)

    No more empty toilet rolls All you have to do is whistle and they'll come running.

  • IP_SEC
    IP_SEC
    will pee sitting down to time indefinite

    I guess I have a leg up on the rest of you guys then. I already pee sitting down. It's much cleaner, less work for the toilet cleaner.

    Ya JW pair o dice would be a living hell with all the beardless faces, short haircuts, and polo dress shirts and kakies

    I told a JW who was enjoying a film awards ceremony "too bad there will be no art like this in the new system"

    ???? "yes there will?"

    Really, we will make movies and write poetry in the new world?

    Sure

    What will it be about? Praise Jehovah this, praise jehovah that? I dont think he will approve of drama and Scifi, and such.

    Jehovah's hand will satisfy all our needs.

    What could I say to that?

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free
    No - sorry toilet paper and public toilets are out of the question.... perhaps that's what all these people are doing ... wondering where to "go"

    So I guess it's safe to assume that in the New System™ JWs will be like bears and shit in the woods.

    W

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    http://www.watchtowerinformationservice.org/great_crowd_ascending_mt_of_jehovah.jpg

    Who Farted?!

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    I recon it was the Londoner!

  • blondie
    blondie

    UB, I can tell about when you left the WTS but the comment about sex in the "new system. The WTS has backed off on the dogmatic comments it made it times past. But, they still can't reconcile what will happen after the "final test" when everyone will be adult and faithful and given 'everlasting life.' Will they have children after that? Will the earth be overpopulated? What about the children born after the final test, how will they be 'tested"? Will God perform birth control like he did with Rachel and Michal?

    Blondie

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce
    UB, I can tell about when you left the WTS but the comment about sex in the "new system. The WTS has backed off on the dogmatic comments it made it times past. But, they still can't reconcile what will happen after the "final test" when everyone will be adult and faithful and given 'everlasting life.' Will they have children after that? Will the earth be overpopulated? What about the children born after the final test, how will they be 'tested"? Will God perform birth control like he did with Rachel and Michal?

    Blondie

    G'day blondie,

    Forgive my playing the dogmatic card. Please correct me if I'm wrong but my hunch is that the Brooklyn Boys leave these things open to conjecture as a matter of policy. Leaving each of the rank and file to imagine their own version of paradise serves the society's purpose well, reinforcing mind control by strengthening the carrot effect.

    I remember many a private discussion about how we would spend eternity. A close Elder friend of mine, Sylvano, had visions of populating a planet of his own* – his wife was not at all impressed and sometimes I chided him about “the planet of the Sylvanos.

    Warm regards, unc.

    Ps: I wonder if Sylvano is a Mormon yet?

  • carla

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