9 Things I hate about everyone....LOL this is funny!

by Chimene 16 Replies latest social humour

  • Chimene
    Chimene

    9 Things I Hate About Everyone

    1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

    2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

    3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

    4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!

    5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

    6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

    7 . When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

    8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

    9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

  • IMustBreakAway
    IMustBreakAway

    Looks like something maddox would write.

    You know what pisses me off? People that poop!

  • wednesday
    wednesday

    number 2 is my personal fav. my husband and sadly me too, do this. why?

  • Chimene
    Chimene

    I do number 2 because I hate trying to go through over 300 chanells on a cable box, LOL

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    How about people who spend 5 minutes looking for the closest possible parking spot rather than walk an additional 10 steps? Oh yeah, then they go and spend an hour working out at the gym.

    W

  • Frannie Banannie
    Frannie Banannie

    ROFL! This sounds SO like George Carlin.

  • Chimene
    Chimene

    George Carlin....Your right! it does!

    I remember a skit he did on house cats once, hillarious! Talking about how they run into glass doors, and say, I meant to do that. He says they have crutches and wheelchairs hidden behind the couch that we don't see when they hurt themselves, it was funny

  • greendawn
    greendawn

    I get irritated when you go to the supermarket check out that says: "express checkout 10 items maximum" and you see there someone putting through a trolleyful of items, and the cashier doesn't say a thing like please sir only 10 items here at most. That really upsets me, 5 or 6 items more is not a problem but 50 or 60 is, especially when you are in a hurry.

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

    I don't get it: why not just say "no sorry, can't you see I'm masturbating?"

  • Chimene
    Chimene
    I don't get it: why not just say "no sorry, can't you see I'm masturbating?"

    LOL! I think i'm going to use that line the next time a Jdub knocks on my door, LOLOLOLOLOL

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