It's true. You were ALWAYS accountable to someone. Always had to wonder whether you MIGHT "stumble" someone. Always afraid that if an elder wanted to talk to you, that somehow you were going to get into trouble. Always being told that IF you didn't do more, you'd be displeasing Jehovah. Always watching your back for the gossip, jealousy and putdowns by others.......Isn't it great to be away from it all?????
Do You Realize That You Lived In Constant Fear as A Witness?
by minimus 21 Replies latest jw friends
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Cellist
Yes, Minimus. It's good to be away from the constant fear. Life has enough frights all on it's own.
It was during a Service Meeting part discussing the blood card that I first realized how much anxiety and fear was being layed on us at the meetings. The KM had a section telling parents to make sure that their children had they're blood cards on them at all times. Even out playing with their friends. It was a light bulb moment.
Cellist
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minimus
"A light bulb moment"....I love that!! Truly, certain things just make it click and there's no mentally turning back.
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LDH
Yes, and since I left, I have made a concious decision to question my actions by whether or not they were fear-based.
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AuldSoul
Oh, yes. I realize. And it tears me up inside that my wife is still toiling under that dread without even knowing it. Her times of intense delight are all separate from JWism, but she looks at JW dogma as something she must do to be pleasing to God.
God apparently wants people who will willingly CHOOSE to become automatons, otherwise he would have CREATED them as automatons.
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minimus
I'll bet your wife's intelligent too. Why can't they see the obvious??
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serendipity
Does this religion attract the neurotic people? My neurotic female relatives became JWs' , bringing their men in with them. They have become more neurotic and passed it along to us kids.
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outnfree
We were just discussing this very phenomenon at our last Meetup with some of the newbies. I know it was fear of my daughter dying at Armageddon that brought me back to studying. As long as it was only my life that would be lost, it was okay that I was not a JW. But once I was responsible for my child's life, I had to get baptized and live the life for her (and my subsequent children's) sake. But the fear never ends, as you pointed out. You cannot have real friendships because you are always worried that a slip of the tongue will result in marking, reproof or worse.
Poor JWs!
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jeeprube
Your are spot on, mate. It's true, the life of a JW is a life of fear. For me, the greatest of my new freedoms is the freedom from fear.