Sex before marriage as a Witness okay, if ...

by free2beme 20 Replies latest jw friends

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  free2beme

  ... you actually get married. If you end up having sex and then breaking up, trust me, someone is going to tell the elders. Saw it happen more times then I could ever count. I remember this one brother I knew who started having sex with his bride-to-be the next day after they got engaged. They would say they were going to work and then meet up at hotels and basically have sex all day. He was a Ministerial Servant and she was a Pioneer. I did not know about it until he broke it off, it seemed he started finding that she had a few things in her personality that he did not want to be married too. He came to my house the night he broke it off and was all stressed, secretly I figured he had slept with her, but he did not admit it. Within hours, his parents were calling him to come home and he was disfellowshipped within a week. His ex-girlfriend was put on public reproof. After all, she told first and he had asked her not too, how sinful.

  I knew tons of Witness couples who admitted to having sex before marriage and many of them were in good standing and holding positions in the congregation at the time. So in this post-Witness life of mine (very post, as it has been a long time), I have concluded the fact that it is okay to have sex before marriage as a Witness, as long as you actually get married. If not, your busted! Because there is nothing like a scorned heart.

  Anyone else come to this conclusion?
• 

  zagor

  
  My feeling about it extends even further. My conclusion is that almost anything goes as long as you don't talk about it, and as long as you know how to shake a living sh*t (through comments at the watchtower) out of those naive ones who admitted their mistake, you're cool.
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  yesidid

  ftm;

  Do you, on just the odd occasion, even momentairly, think of anything besides sex?
• 

  Purza

  I know a couple that had sex before marriage and the marriage starting going bad. The wife (in order to keep the husband) told on them and both were DF'd. Her plan worked though as they are still married 5 years later, however they are still unhappy.

  Purza
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  stillajwexelder

  Yes I saw this and agree -and usually it is the women that are the worse for telling
• 

  free2beme

  I know a couple that had sex before marriage and the marriage starting going bad. The wife (in order to keep the husband) told on them and both were DF'd. Her plan worked though as they are still married 5 years later, however they are still unhappy.

  
  Did they come back into the religion, or was it leaving that kept their marriage together? As for the person who asked if I think about something other then sex ... follow this link http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/104161/1.ashx
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  DaCheech

  Before I got engaged I was talked by 2 elders for holding my girfriends hand. she is now my wife. But it would of been OK if we were engaged
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  Purza

  Did they come back into the religion, or was it leaving that kept their marriage together?

  They were reinstated, but I heard they are not too regular in their meeting attendance.

  Purza
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  stillAwitness

  For holding hands DaCheech??? Boy, I think I can not be surprised anymore but someone posts something seemingly way out there and here I am mouth opened wide while I read that.
• 

  DaCheech

  And the elder that reported me saw me at a pool party with plenty of "chapperones".

  He was in his 20's to top it off!