need help from all ex j.w's please

by miss_ellie 30 Replies latest jw friends

  • AlmostAtheist
    Though not a Watchtower apologist, under any circumstances, I believe they got that part right about one's responsibility to take Christmas and all that it entails in a sobering light.

    I love to read this sort of post because it serves as a reminder that "apostates" are not a group. We're all individuals. JW's paint us all with the same brush, but nothing could be further from the truth.

    It also serves as proof that we don't all reject EVERYTHING the Watchtower taught.


  • Deputy Dog
    Deputy Dog

    Tell your X that when he starts using the Jewish calendar You will think about not celebrating Christmas

    Why is he using a pagan calender?

  • jgnat

    I am a non-JW, but I've heard all the JW excuses. Here are my top retorts.

    Q You have the date wrong.

    A. So what? The Japanese all celebrate their birthday on the same day, not the day of their birth.

    Q. It has pagan origins.

    A. (In my best Forrest Gump voice) Pagan is as pagan does. What I celebrate is not pagan. There will be no orgies, baby sacrifices, or beheadings at my Christmas.

    Q. Christmas is all a bunch of commercial hype.

    A. Not my Christmas. I choose to make it a time of family gathering, food, love and joy.

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    I must agree with jgnat on the reasons she lists.

    But in addition I have this one reason that makes it important to me;

    When I was a jw - from the age of 5 till the age of 48 - I was lied to about doctrine, chronology, history of Christianity, history of the Jehovah's witnesses movement. I was decieved and lied to about the organizations' participation in political and commercial scandals. I was lead about like a blind man who trusted his mentor, only to find that mentor to be as blind as I. I was instructed to reject my friends who sinned against this organization and/or it's dogmatic doctrine, to treat them as if they were dead, including my own child when she sinned. I was told to submit my spirit and my brain to the organization. I was told to follow the credo "My religion, right or wrong." And I did.

    I sacrificed 43 years of my life on the Watchtower alter of false religion, while awaiting the fulfillment of false prophecy that they promulgated, then in essense denied even uttering. I missed out on sports, education, travel, career, hobbies, holidays, job promotions, the joy of seeing my daughter get gifts at holidays, etc. I 'shunned' my own family during holidays and viewed them as evil, worldly, under the influence of demons. Now at 50 I find myself very alone, no traditions to fall back on, no friends to fall back on, no money, no career, and most of the family that I showed such hatred to for not being witnesses are dead and I cannot ever apologize to them for showing such lack of love and concern for them.

    I did all that for the sake of a religion that is clearly and provably on many fronts, evil, wicked, manipulative, viscious, hateful in so many ways.

    After I left due to conscience I was treated as 'evil slave' class, shunned, hated, ignored, lost all my friends in life. Yet not one single sin according to the Bible can I be accused of, nor have any of my so called friends come to 'rescue me' from my error. [Not that I would be rescued]

    I started celebrating this holiday last year - not because parts of it can be proven or not proven to be pagan in some way - but because the organization that taught me to not celebrate it is made up of liars. I no longer trust liars, no matter how self proclaimed to be the servant organization of God. Why should I trust any decision to liars? Jesus said properly of those who imitate Satan by lying and misleading others for their own gain; "They are from their father the Devil". And I believe him!


  • stevenyc

    The reason why Jehovah's Witnesses don't celebrate Christmas is due to their origins. They are formed on the foundation of Calvinism. This puritanical theology was maintained, and even strengthened by the puritans, primarily based around the New England area. The puritans associated Christ-Mas with the Roman Catholic church. And, therefore, in their obsession with disassociation of anything Christendom, banned it. They also made the connection back to the mother land with this celebration. With this approach it was easier to make people accept the 'no Christmas' rule.

    A reprieve occurred during the mid 1800's. During this time, New England schools started to have holidays at Christmas, and copying the German settlers, evergreen firs became popular in the area. Hence, they slowly started to celebrate.

    The bible student movement, which became the Jehovah's Witnesses, which was born out of the Millerite movement, also celebrated Christmas. And, it wasn't until the early - mid 1900's that they resorted back to their puritanical forefathers, and banned Christmas celebration once again. This was ordered by Josef Rutherford, the then leader of the Jehovah's Witnesses. It was his opinion that in celebrating Christmas, too much attention was given to Christ and not enough to his father. So he banned it as a pagan holiday.


  • stevenyc

    jgnat said: There will be no orgies, baby sacrifices, or beheadings at my Christmas.

    I wont be attending your parties then!


  • AlmostAtheist

    It occurs to me that my comments regarding Prophecor's post might be misconstrued. It was not a criticism of his position at all. Rather, it was an expression of my true happiness at seeing people expressing their freedom to think and act as their conscience tells them.

    As JW's, we didn't have that luxury. Much lip service was paid to conscience, but we rarely got to actually use them. Generally speaking, there was a rule or principle in place to tell you what to do, no conscience required or desired.

    If a person in good faith chooses to avoid Christmas because they think God doesn't like it, I'm thrilled that they are free to make that call.


  • jb

    Both my Husband and I grew up without Christmas. I always felt left out and sad that I wasn't with the rest of my family for any of the holidays. We celebrate them now. I do not make x-mas about religion at all. For us its about tradition and being together as a family.

  • tetrapod.sapien

    i was taught that a god who doesn't exist would get really pissed if he found me celebrating any ancient pagan holidays. this was serious, because you know, those old pagans really gave him a run for his money. and old grudges die hard! ha ha!


  • luna2

    I don't even know what I believe any more...other than religion gives me a big fat headache. I'm treating Christmas as a purely secular holiday, at least for this year. I grew up celebrating, so this year is kind of a return to childhood memories for me.

    I bought a little tree just to see how I feel about it. I kind of like the twinkley lights, although, the whole business of putting little glass balls, lights, ribbons and candy canes all over a fake evergreen tree is kind of weird. My parents asked me to come over for dinner and I'm happy to do that. I'm hoping my mother doesn't get herself all frazzled over dinner or anything as life is too short to be stressing about this stuff.

    As long as I can keep Christmas kind of low key and pleasant, its fine. I have no intention of letting it become something I dread or worry about at all. Maybe I'm just old. LOL

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