As a JW did you accept birthday/Christmas gifts? What is WTS policy?

by blondie 13 Replies latest jw friends

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  pratt1

  It is improper to ask people not to send you a gift, however how many dubs did you know that actually sent a gift to those that gave them gifts during the holiday season at a non holiday time?

  My guess is that very few recpricate in gift giving.

  Or how about when you were a child, when you received a gift from a worldly relative, did you dub parents insist that you end then a thank you card?

  Again my guess is that very few do.

  Most dubs are either ignorant or too selfish to show proper manners when it comes to anything financial.
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  Dansk

  My wife and I really missed not celebrating Christmas when we were in Dubdom, but we were glad of the money it saved us in not having to buy presents for umpteen relatives and their children. So our own kids didn't miss out we celebrated our baptism day and called it "Present Day", whereby we all bought one another presents. It was lovely seeing our kids' eyes light up at all the presents - but I still felt that it didn't have the same effect as Christmas.

  The whole pagan thing is galling, too, because wedding rings are pagan and yet nothing is said against them! Now, we celebrate Christmas BIG time and buy presents here, there and everywhere. My younger daughter is now living back home but still has her JW head on. We have bought her loads of Christmas presents and she is really looking forward to recieving them. However, she has told us that she won't be home Christmas day because she doesn't celebrate Christmas. I replied:"NO, but you'll accept the presents." To which she said: "I didn't ask you to buy them!"

  She's right, of course, but hypocrisy is rife.

  I also used to get annoyed at a thrifty elder and his wife. Whenever there was something to celebrate we used to buy cards for people, for example, wedding anniversaries, whereas the elder's wife used to make her own cards using cardborad and cutting out pictures and pasting them on, etc. It wasn't that they couldn't afford to buy cards and presents, they were just so thrifty!

  Yes, we missed out on birthdays, too, and yet the more I think of the reason - two occasions in scripture where death resulted on birthdays - I think of how utterly stupid the anti-birthday thing is. There's absolutely nothing in scripture to say one shouldn't celebrate it. It was just another way of getting us to save our hard-earned money and be conditioned into pouring into Watchtower's coffers. Damn, we even made out a standing order so that the society got regular money from us every month

  The first thing we did when we exited was stop the standing order!

  Just goes to show, it isn't anything scriptural that had us not celebrating Christmas and birthdays, it was a direct result of abiding to Watchtower's policy. Obviously, the fear of disfellowshipping even came into it, because who would let it be known that they celebrated Christmas or birthdays?! As I've said many times, this heinous cult thrives on the fearsome hold it has over its followers - which even extends into public holiday periods known for their unselfish giving!

  Ian
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  crabbyGabby

  <div>My mother started studying with JWs when I was about 10. We had moved away from our extended family, and it had been our custom to visit them during the Christmas holiday. I think I was about 12 when Mother was baptized, and my paternal grandfather (Catholic) came to visit us that Christmas. The whole holiday was pretty traumatic (to the point that I don't remember details well), but I do recall refusing to open presents and then being told by my father (a lapsed Catholic) to open them.
  
  My mother's adherence to the belief system of the JWs has really wrecked my immediate family. For one thing, my parents divorced when I was 15. I did not have a "normal" relationship with my father for 10 years afterwards, but thankfully I came to realize that their problems were just that - their problems - and nothing to do with me personally. My father had bypass surgery this summer, and when I discussed it with my brother (who is now a MS in CO), he refused to call or write anything to his father. When I suggested he call our father in the ICU, he said, "Oh, I can't do that." Our father had a pump helping his heart to beat, and my brother could not be bothered to even call to say "I love you" before my father went into surgery. I presume he behaved this way because his father is not a JW.
  
  I realize that I am my own person, I now make my own decisions, and that I am not responsible for the (in)action of others; regardless, I find my brother's behavior extremely distasteful. My mother knows all about my brother's behavior, yet says nothing about it.
  
  BTW, my brother and his wife were blessed with a son last year, and the only way our father knew about it was from me. I felt it was "the right thing to do" to let him know this. The only pictures he has seen of his only grandchild have been from me. When my husband and I visited my father and his wife at Christmas, I noticed that the picture of my brother that had hung on the wall next to mine was replaced with my husband's and my engagement picture!!
  
  Sooooo... I guess the WTS policy is for children to dishonor their parents by refusing to speak to them and to hide important family events from them.
  
  PS I was a JW publisher but was never baptized. I have not decided whether it is necessary for me to write a DA letter to anyone. I tried out Unitarian Universalism with my husband after we married, but we kind of let that go. </div>
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  serendipity

  Hi crabbygabby, welcome to the forum! Your brother's treatment of your father is shameful ! Hopefully he opens his eyes and heart before it's too late.