How long do you have to be out...

by jeanniebeanz 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • jeanniebeanz

    ...before you really don't care about this anymore?


  • codeblue

    Excellent question!

    I think that answer will vary with each poster.

    For me, when my kids are out, I will breathe easier.

    IF we were to relocate, where nobody ever knows we have had a history with the JW's, could help keep that history where it should be: in the past.

  • misspeaches

    If my family were no longer in it and I didn't have to encounter people from my old congregation I would be rid of it.

    Unfortunately however both these factors ensure that it is something that keeps raising its ugly head.

  • wombat

    Been out of it for 31 years (over half my life) and they still make me angry....Look..they are still controlling my emotions.

  • Frannie Banannie
    Frannie Banannie
    ...before you really don't care about this anymore?

    Jeanniebeanz, I don't know if my timeframe for "getting over it" would be a good one to measure by. I was isolated for 7 yrs after I forced 'em to dF me and it took me another 5 yrs to really "move on" to where I don't really give a rat sass about "news" or "issues" concerning the WTS. Occasionally, I will reply on a thread dealing with a poster's personal issues revolving around WTS policies and treatment of them, but that's about it now.


  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    I was out for 10 years before I started dealing with it. Been out for 10 years since then

    Dealing with any kind of abuse takes time. Don't want to discourage you but even now 20 years later there are things that get stirred up. The death of my sister last month stirred some stuff up again.

    But for the most part it doesn't affect me or my life. I'm here to offer whatever help I can to those who need it. And from time to time to get some support. Coping with the aftermath isn't a regular part of my life. I have developed the skills to process and work through many issues fairly quickly now.

    Like everything in life recovery will take whatever time you put into it. If you ignore the issues they will sit there ready to throw you off balance. If you deal with them as they arise you will get through it a lot faster.

    And the truth is that regardless of how much you have worked on your issues life has a way of throwing curve balls at us. I never would have anticipated the death of my sister. It was the first death since my aunt's suicide 40 years ago. Once the issue is brought up you have a new layer of things to deal with.

  • mkr32208

    Two weeks?

    I just do it cause yer all so interesting!

  • freedom96

    Personally, I don't need this for any other reason other than getting the latest information of what is going on with the organization, and that is mainly because I still have loved ones involved.

  • MsMcDucket

    I don't know. I still find myself holding on to some of the old beliefs. The other day, I found myself not wanting to say "knock on wood". I get taken aback when someone says "Merry Christmas" or "good luck". I have got to get the old ways of thinking out of my head. I don't know how long that will take. I know that as long as my daughters are in there, I'm going to be dealing with this organization. But, I still will be trying to get those old ways of thinking out of my head!

  • cyberdyne systems 101
    cyberdyne systems 101

    Like most major experiences in life they never leave you entirely, but there is no reason for fear as we learn to live with things, returning to a relative normality. Sometimes as has been suggested our 'theocratic' training will effect our reactions to things that 'normal' (what is normal - lol) people take for granted. Each time we face something that our former mind reacts to it helps us move forward and beyond it, but we'll never forget...

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