I think we needed to laugh...

by Sparkplug 12 Replies latest jw friends

  • Sparkplug

    Ok, forgive me because I am a bit buzzed as I write this. (My 50 year old close gal called and needed to get out, she NEVER does this, so after close to 10 years of her being a hermit, I went and had a drink or two with her.)

    Today I went to counseling with my son. It was a serious situation.

    Background: He is 15 and quite a wonderful young man. He has Tourettes and depression and ADD. He gets it all honest. With his high IQ and lack of social desire and skills, he has overcome extreme obstacles. He went from a suicidal state at age 8 to an exceptional studunt, wonderful son and truly aspires to reach great levels in education and has such a strong interest in Music. The world is before him and he cannot see it. Lately though he has become overwhelmed.

    This has led to depression, mood swings and basically he cannot stand my guts nor find any joy in life. Seeing he was in such a state at 8 years of age this has thrown my world into a huge tailspin. I know he needs some help, counseling, therapy or meds to pull him out of this and every step I take to help him leads to resentment towards me. He does not want something to be wrong with him. It is a delicate problem.


    Today as we go for help, he is glaring at me and I am trying to keep a step ahead of every tactic that he can throw in my path of getting him some help.

    The psych walks in and he has a half bald head that is overgrown with this mop of wild hair. It looks as if he took a huge blowdryer to his landing strip on his head and he starts spouting something out of a scientific comic book. My son, nor I understood a thing he said. His pants were hiked up like Erckel of that TV show, and he really needs some social skills himself.

    We consent to a QEEG test because we don't understand a thing this wild PiCa Chu looking man is saying and it sounds like he knows something we don't have an answer and he can talk fast and has enough where-with-all to dress and look as he does and... well, "What do we know because we have resorted to glaring and sitting in different corners."

    He rattled off something about hair gel, no joke and it sounded like he mentioned suction cups on my sons head.

    So he left the room and we both, as angry, as we were decided to laugh till we cried. Tears rolling down our faces and no control in sight.

    We went to make an appointment and we still could not stop.

    The receptionist is trying to make an appointment and asks what is funny. We cannot tell her.."Your boss," so we continue laughing.

    We laughed all the way home.

    It really was strange to be so depressed and angry, hurt and confused, and then end up laughing till we cried.

    It felt good.

    Laughter truly is the best medicine. Maybe we should just read Readers Digest instead?

  • theinfamousone

    wow, sparks... first off, sorry to hear about what your son has to go through... i remember i was diagnosed with ADHD when i was pretty young and people always looked at me funny, well teachers anyways, they all thought i was a moron.... i know it is nothing in comparison to what your son has to go through, but when you start to lose hope, remember that everyone lost it on me too, and yet i now go to school on full scholarships due to my grades... DONT GIVE UP, EITHER OF YOU...

    oh and your shrink sounds like a tool... but at least you got to laugh a little...... that always feels good....

    the infamous one

  • defd

    sounds like you had a much needed break.


  • Sparkplug

    Yes the psych, the is a pure tinker toy...

    Question: Were you mad for having this at your parents? Do you believe you have it now, and did you take meds and well...I want all the info. I know I have it, not hyper and such but the opposite and He has it too. It is written all over his short term concentration and memory abilities. It is like he cant get from point A to B.

    I cannot stand that he is hating on his one lifeline, but I have to be a parent and sometimes dish out some sour medicine.

    I think he is growing out of Tourettes like a good percentage of people do, but he must learn about himself and regulating the depression. I swear he went through 3 moods in five minutes before we laughed. (That was truly justified though) I Truly understand the anger and resentment. I just want him to succeed and sometimes that takes me actually being a hard ass.

    I guess I am looking for any advice now. I got some good advice this last week from a very admirable couple of people and it helped me make it through his mood swings this week, so anything else may give me insight.

  • theinfamousone

    well i found out when shortly after i got to this country... as for feeling resentment towards my parents, well, i didnt have the luxury of it, since they were dead.... but i never really did think of it... to this day i kinda believe it was mis diagnosed... sometimes its one of those things that drx. just say when a kid is over active... i dont know tho.....

    yeah sometimes its hard to get from point a to point b... but it just takles a little time and concentration...

    the infamous one

  • Sparkplug

    He is the opposite He is not active. Not hyper at all. His own self contained little stone wall. It really is hard for me to understand seeing I am not as closed as he. I do understand the concept of too many thoughts and ideas going on. Story of my life. When I take meds, I am so much better. It is like I can grab some of the crap that flies around in my head and get stuff organized.

    If I don't take it, I make list of things to do, and forget I wrote the list, start another, then find the first, try to merge them, and turn around and forget I had a list or two by the time I get home. It is a pain in my rear.

  • avishai

    If he wants to email or call me, that's cool. I have a dystonia condition that makes me flop around like crazy.

    Plus, I had a crazy ass neurologist, and have worked with kids (don't tell him that, At 15 ya don't think your a kid).

    It sucks, even at 35 to have people look at ya funny, but I just tell 'em that I'm not an epileptic, I'm a pentacostal

  • Satanus

    I wonder if that shrink didn't do that on purpose. Maybe he knew what you guys needed.


  • Sparkplug

    Avishai- That is funny. Who knows If I get desperate enough...not that you are last choicxe...I will have him call. (You know he wont)

    Satanus- I wondered the same myself. It was so very odd.

  • Billygoat

    (((((Sparky and Son)))))

    You're a good mom Sparky. Your son needed that moment probably more than you did. And I have a feeling the memory of that moment will carry with him until he's an adult. I grew up a pretty serious child. It really wasn't until I met my husband that I learned to "chill" and look for the humour in life. It was really his example that inspired me. Today I love to laugh and am teaching myself to "lighten up" and not be so serious about things. There is nothing in life better than hearing my husband belly laugh. And if I'm the one that caused it, it's even better!

    Maybe it's time for some good DVD comedies for the two of you to watch. Maybe he needs to learn how to laugh a little more? You're a little comedienne yourself, so I'm sure you'll do just fine!

    Love ya girl,


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