Well, I'm just going to throw out my opinion hear. I as you stated
There is a morbid romanticism that comes with war.
It's not only culture (in my opinion) but a human need to see what we can endure and live through. The thing is we also have self preservation and also the capacity to not take everything fed to us by our government and media.
As far as WWll goes, Kurt Vonnegut was a veteran of that war and still thinks it was wrong. Read Slaughter House 5. I think the veterans of WWll seemed bigger and better than those of the following wars because media has claimed they are bigger and better. Maybe that generation was made stronger because of the childhood they endured during the depression? Have you ever seen The Straight Story? It's not about WW2 but there's a scene where the lead character (a vet) stops in a bar and talks to another WW2 vet--it's heart wrenching.
I think there are some people serving right now that are proud of serving and are strong people but I've known one Iraq vet who killed himself on leave last year and another that returned in June that just isn't the same person. He was always telling me to smile and now all he does is start fights with strangers and talk about death.